I think reflection is important. Our past makes up who we are in the present and influences who we CAN become in the future. It is important to revisit our histories to see where we have come from, what we have learned... to laugh, to cry, to remember.
I have shared with you all much of my thoughts and feelings over this last week. As I have said before I do it because I think it is important for me to share my struggles as well as my scuccesses with you all. The 1000 Challenge is about living life to the fullest.
Living life to the fullest... an expression that has been so badly mis-understood. I think we have a false definition of what "living life to the fullest" means. I would wager that most people would say that "kiving life to the fullest" is living a life full of smiles, giggles, living in the moment, doing things your way and on your terms. I agree 100 percent. However, there is an important part of the definition that is missing here.
Human beings, we are experiential creatures; meaning that we use the experiences we have in life to build up the fabric of our lives. A part of the human experience is our ability to feel: Pain, Joy, Anger, Lust, Happiness etc... all of these emotions are a part of who and what we are.
In life there is going to be saddness, struggles, anger, frustration etc... and because of this I think "living life to the fullest," really means living a life full of human experience. Yes, we want more giggles, smiles, and the majority of our time devoted to doing things on your terms, but it is just as important to allow yourself to experience the other side of life. Not to become it, but to experience it.
The above reasons are why I have wanted to share as much as I have with you. This last week has been a challenge for me, I have spent a great deal of time reflecting, remembering, morning, and celebrating people who have come and gone from my life. I feel good about it to. It has been a very cathartic, very healing experience for me. By acknowledging my pain, by embracing my sorrow, I have been able to finally process certain thoughts and feelings that I have been resisting for quite sometime.
I have already shared thoughts and feelings on my friend Gabe. If you have not got a chance to watch the video I put together, please check it out here: Remembering Gabe
To bring this personal week of rememberance and reflection to a close, I wanted to share with you my Dad.
Yesterday was Father's Day here in the USA, my second one spent without the physical presence of my Dad in my life. I say "physical presence" because while he is gone, he, like Gabe, is certainly not forgotten.
Like Gabe, my Dad's death was unexpected and it came as a shock. When I spoke to him the last time, I didn't think twice when I hung up the phone that that would be the final time I heard my Dad's voice. Losing him was devestating. Not just because of the obvious loss of my Father, but also because I allowed it to push me right back into a black hole that I had been working so hard to crawl out of.
What follows is my Eulogy I read at my Dad's service, February 6th, 2010. I ask that when you finish reading it, you first close your eyes and allow yourself to feel whatever emotions may or may not come up, and then take a moment to write down your thoughts and feelings on a piece of paper. Allow yourself to experience being a human, allow yourself to live life to the fullest.