Why do We Cause Pain?

Hellllloooo Everyone!

A few quick updates/reminders before I get to the blog

1 - Remember, next Tuesday, October 1st, is the start of the "Life is Beautiful" Challenge.  I am really excited to see the photos you all share.  Please click here for more information.  Remember this is a global event so you can participate wherever you are in the world.

2 - Thank you everyone who has taken the time to "like," "subscribe," provide me with feedback, and forward on my Youtube videos.  It means a lot to me when you all do that.  Thank You! :)

Ok Blog time...

This morning at about 5:25am I was in the kitchen doing a little cooking when I heard a horrible shriek.    I went outside to try to figure out what was going on and then I heard it again followed by the unmistakeable barking noises of coyotes.

Since the noise sounded like it was coming from a residential area below me, I can only assume that someone's cat or dog was turned into breakfast for a group of hungry coyotes.

I felt so bad for the poor animal that was killed.  I thought to myself its' last moments must have been so frightening and so painful.  I thought about the owners and how they will feel when they wake up in the morning and realize that the family cat or dog cannot be found.

I kept thinking about the pain the animal must have felt and the pain the family will no doubt feel when they figure out what happened.

I wanted to be mad at the coyotes.  Even though I can understand why they made the kill, to eat, to survive, I kept thinking: "What if I had a cat or a dog and they had killed mine, how would I feel?"

I kept thinking about pain and then I started thinking about us, people, humans... I started thinking about why we cause pain, specifically to each other.  Why do we hurt each other with our words?  Why do we harm one another with our actions?  Why is there war?  Why is there anger?  Why do we say we will do one thing and then do another?  Why????

Here we are, human beings, supposedly the most highly evolved species on the planet, yet we do more to cause pain, in many more ways than the coyotes do, why?

Then it hit me - we are just like the coyotes, we cause pain to survive.

Think about it; there is no other logical explanation for why we do what we do other than our survival.

When we gossip, or talk badly about someone behind their back what do we get out of it?  We get the satisfaction of knowing in that moment that we:

1. Belong to a group
2. Are Right and if we are right that means we are ok and if we are ok that means we do not need to change.
3. Share a common opinion/thought/feeling with others
4. As gossipers aka members of a group we have superiority over the one we are gossiping about
5. Are protected from ever having to examine the inadequacy/insecurity we feel inside of ourself that leads us to gossip about the other person.
6. Gossip about that person to protect these inadequacies/insecurities because that person threatens them in some way shape or form.
7. If 1 - 5 are true then we can safely say that we gossip to survive.
8. Will inevitably need to gossip again as we will only feel good as long as the buzz of the most recent gossip session lasts.

Think about war and the reasons people fight:

1. To ensure the protection and survival of their people
2. To ensure the protection and survival of their way of life
3. To ensure the protection and survival of their views/beliefs
4. To ensure the protection and survival of their economic interests
5. To ensure the protection and survival of their power
6. To ensure the protection and survival of their status

Are you seeing a pattern yet?

It all comes down to survival.  Whether we are trying to ensure the survival of our thoughts, our ideas, our insecurities or our shortcomings, we cause pain to others because we want these parts of ourself to survive.  We are to afraid to deal with our own "stuff" so we would rather deal with someone else's so that our way of life can continue on.

Make sense?

Here's the thing, are we really truly happy living this way, living to survive?  Could there be another way?

This past weekend I had a client in town for a Zero Limits Boot Camp.  We, ironically enough, spent quite a bit of time on this very subject: Survival vs the Alternative.  What is the alternative to surviving?

THRIVING!!!!  

Yes the alternative to surviving is thriving.  What is thriving you might ask?  My answer: look at a little kid - that is thriving.

We were all born to thrive.  One could argue that we need basic necessities to ensure our survival: food, water, shelter, love, etc...   I wound counter that argument by saying these basic necessities are really meant to be the source of our fuel that enables us to thrive.

What does a thriving life look like?  Gossip does not exist in a thriving life.  We have no need to talk badly or make fun of others because we are so happy with ourselves that we no longer need to compare ourselves with others.

In a thriving life we honor our word.  We do what we say we are going to do when we are going to do it.  

In a thriving life we "Secure our oxygen mask first before we secure another's."  

In a thriving life, when we do help someone, we help them for the simple joy of helping, and not because we need to do it to feel better about ourselves.

In a thriving life we do not need to hurt one another: physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually.  In a thriving life we fully accept, embrace, and love ourselves as well as others.

In a thriving life we do not cause each other pain.

Do you see the difference?  Which life are you currently living?  Which way do you want to live?  How much more amazing can Your life become if You choose to make the shift from surviving to thriving?  

I would love to hear your thoughts, please take a moment to share them below.  

Lastly, if You are ready to make some changes and shift from a surviving life to a thriving life, I would love to have the opportunity to help You on Your journey.  If this is You and You are ready to start thriving, please click here to contact me.

I wish You a thriving life. :)

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

Shit Happens... for a Reason

Hello Everyone!

I hope this blog finds you doing well and living life the best you can.

I firmly believe everything happens for a reason. Even the toughest... the shittiest parts of life, I believe there is a reason to those as well.

The challenge that we all face is to look for the reason, the more empowering perspective, so that when the "shit" does happen, which it will - to all of us, we can deal with it and move forward vs. let it consume us and dictate our lives.

I recorded a short video for You where I talk more in depth about this.  I hope you find this video to be of value.

Enjoy.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

Be Like a Plant and get Your Chlorophyll

Katie has a great science lesson for us all.  Take a few moments to read it.  I am sure you will find a lot of value from it.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

If you're like me, the only thing you know (or knew) chlorophyll as, is a substance that is essential for photosynthesis and is responsible for the green color of plant life. However, chlorophyll in its liquid form, or in tablets like Spirulina which contain it, are quickly becoming the new "it" for natural supplements. It's no secret that dark green veggies are wonderful for our health, but hundreds of articles and blogs are touting the blood-boosting, cleansing properties of chlorophyll in its pure, liquid form. Now, I'm not sure if people endorsing the product can actually feel their red blood cells multiplying, and there is a lack of scientific evidence proving chlorophyll’s benefits, but let's explore what some people are saying about this new magic in a bottle :)


Science does know that Chlorophyll has a similar molecular structure as hemoglobin. Hemoglobin is a protein that exists in our red blood cells and helps transport oxygen throughout our bodies. Chlorophyll supposedly can help with this process by strengthening and replenishing our red blood cells, thereby increasing the vitality of all our bodies’ functional systems.


Chlorophyll’s ability to alkalize the body is another mentioned benefit. At the core of chlorophyll molecules is magnesium, a highly alkaline mineral. This means it would help lower our body’s acidity level and keep a balanced pH. Symptoms of too much acid include inflammation, gastrointestinal discomfort, and a weaker immune system.


Lastly, many say chlorophyll deodorizes and detoxifies the body, and even cures bad breath. It binds to and expels heavy metal toxins e.g., mercury, and kills bad odors in our throats and mouths that originate in our intestines.


If imbibing this green liquid weirds you out, skip it. Just make sure you’re getting plenty of greens in your diet, especially dark leafy ones (they’re green because of chlorophyll!). Raw, cooked, or juice form are all perfectly acceptable.



Best,

Katie

Fuel Up

Hi all,

Katie has come across a pretty inspiring story and wanted to share it with you all.  Read on and enjoy. :)

Fuel up!





In sticking with my food for fuel theme, I wanted to share this article with you all. Learning what other athletes eat, what music they listen to while working out, and even what athletic gear they prefer is always so interesting to me.





Obviously, all of our bodies are different and will react differently to the same diets, exercises, and motivations, but it's fun to know how extreme athletes keep it up.





The girl featured in this article is the first to attempt RUNNING the entire route of the Tour de France. I can't even imagine biking it. To complete this task in her goal time frame, she has to run at least a marathon everyday! Pretty nuts right? Along the way she stayed with host families, so had to make do with what they were preparing for dinner that night in order to properly fuel her body.





Learn what she eats along the way to sustain herself and what inspires her to keep going, and if she completed her goal here: http://www.shape.com/healthy-eating/diet-tips/day-my-diet-endurance-athlete-zo%C3%AB-romano





Best,





Katie

Marathon Pasta

Katie has cooked up a delicious recipe for us all!  I am going to be trying this asap.  If you have any healthy recipe's you would like to share, I would love to see them.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

Recipe for a (long) Run.

I'm not a big fan of pasta. I mean, it’s good stuff, but I've somehow convinced myself that my body can't handle these carbohydrates.  Big bowls of white pasta smothered in creamy sauces scare me, and so I tend to stick with fish, salads, and the occasional pizza when it comes to Italian dining. 

But no food should be the enemy, so last year when I had my "last supper" before running a half marathon, I figured some carbs would do me good.  I went with gluten-free brown rice pasta because the slower processing carbs would give me longer lasting energy and not spike my blood sugar like processed white pastas can.  Here’s what I made:

What you'll need…..

1 cup uncooked brown rice or whole wheat pasta (whatever one serving is, more if you plan to share)

Any fresh veggies you have on hand:  broccoli, cauliflower, Kale, zucchini, onion, squash, cherry tomatoes, snap peas, brussel sprouts etc…  Feel free to add in some chopped apple for sweetness or yam for more heartiness.

Salt

Pepper

Rosemary or Oregano

Soy sauce

Balsamic vinegar

Parmesan, Goat, or Ricotta cheese

Preheat oven to 450 degrees.  Chop all veggies to desired size and put in the same bowl.  Pour in soy sauce, balsamic, and olive oil.  I'd say about 3 tablespoons of each. Add spices to taste, but be careful with the salt as soy sauce is salty on its own. Toss to coat. Spread onto a baking sheet and place in oven for 25-30 minutes or until fork tender.  Move veggies around sheet occasionally for more even cooking and to prevent burning.

When you've got 5-10 minutes left on the veggies, cook your pasta according to package instructions.

Put pasta into your bowl and add as many of the roasted veggies as you'd like.  Top with cheese (optional, but it's good) and enjoy!

Best,

Katie

Build Your Job Around Your Life vs Building Your LIfe Around Your Job

Wazzz Up Everyone!

I hope this blog finds you all smiling and doing your best to make this day a great one!

I had a conversation with a good friend of mine a few days back and I wanted to share it with you all.  My friend is 27 years old he is a true Entrepreneur.  After college he took out a huge loan, moved away from his friends and started his own business.  He has now started several other small businesses over the years.  The guy has an amazing work ethic, a good business sense, and the drive to succeed.

As we were chatting the other day he told me he was struggling trying to figure out what he wanted his career to be.  He has a ton of ideas, knows that he could be good at many jobs, but he is unsure about what is right for him.

I told him this, "Instead of focussing on what your career is going to be, focus on what you want your life to be like, then figure out a career that will support that."

The change in the language is a tiny one, the change it produces in ones' though process is HUGE!

So often we human beings live our lives according to what our job's allow.  If our job says we can only have 1 week of vacation a year we wait to take that one week of vacation.  If our job says we can only ever make "this much" then we focus in on that number and shut down the potential we all have to make more.  If our job says we are supposed to work at it for 30+ years until we retire, THEN we can finally start living life, we listen, we settle into the routine, and we look ahead to 30 years from now when we can start doing all the things we really want to do.

I am not saying the above is a bad thing because it is not.  And, it works really well for a lot of people.  The problem I do have with the above is it puts limits on our thinking.  It forces you to narrow your focus to the future and limits you from exploring the possibilities that exist around you at this very minute.  To give you an example:  Put your hands up to the side of your eyes, notice how your field of vision is reduced because your hands obstruct your peripheral vision.  You are left with the ability to see only what is right in front of you.  Now, if you take your hands down, you will notice that you can see all that is around you as well.  It is as if a whole new perspective just opened up for you.

When you get into the mindset of building your life around your job/career, your job becomes the focus, it becomes the driving force for what you do.  When your job is the focus, guess what, the hands go up to the side of your face, and your field of vision is reduced.

When you instead get into the mindset of building your job/career around your life, your life now becomes the driving force for what you do because it is now front and center, it is your focus.  Your hands come down from the side of your face and now you are able to see the world that is around you.

The world that is around you is where all the possibility lies.

I promise you, there are jobs out there that will support you living how you want to live.  I promise you that there are inventions out there that need to be invented that will give you the freedom you desire.  I promise you that there are opportunities out there that will let you live the lifestyle of your dreams, if you will just start challenging yourself by dreaming what you want your life to be like.

Most of us wish we could live life in a certain way, but we never challenge ourselves to start thinking about HOW we can live it in that way.

Focus on your life and what you want it to be like.  As you learn to do that, you will figure out a way to make it happen.

I would love to hear your thoughts, please share them below.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

Airports... Why they should be the World's Most Positive Places

Wazzz Up Everyone!

I was in an airport a couple of weeks ago.  I love airports because if I am there that means I am going somewhere, and I LOVE going places.

I also love being in airports because I think they provide the ultimate people watching experience.

One thing I have noticed is that airports seem to have a lot of negative vibes in them, why?

Is it because we are bombarded with more news reports about the evil acts the TSA has plotted for us vs. hearing more stories about the family reunion between the solider returning home from war and his loved ones?

Is it because people dread going to the airport because they just know the airline is going to lose their luggage?

Or, is it because people hate going to airports because they are 100% certain that the weather God's and airlines are conspiring together to make sure every single one of their flights are delayed?

Is it one of these in particular, or is it a combination of all the above?

Call me crazy, but I have this theory about airports and it goes something like this:

I believe that 99.9999% of the time that you are at an airport should be a positive.  The 0001% of the time is only if there was some sort of horrible catastrophe, like a plane crash (which sadly as of this writing, there was just a plane crash earlier today at SFO).

What do I mean by that?

Well think about it, if you are at an airport to go on vacation, that is positive right?  If you are at an airport because your work is sending you on a business trip, that means you have a job, and that is positive, right?  If you are traveling to visit family members, friends, old college pals, etc... that means you have people out there who, at the very least, like you, and that is positive right?  Even if you were traveling because someone was sick, dying, or had died, at least you have the means to go and travel to see that person/pay your respects (after all many people do not), and that is positive, right?

I travel a decent amount and, while I do not know everything there is to know about traveling, I can summarize this little secret I am going to let all you in on:

There is not an evil head of TSA out there dreaming up ways to piss you off.  The ticket agent does not wake up fantasizing about how they are going to ruin your day.  The airlines do not build their daily agenda around losing your luggage.  AND, this is the big one, the weather Gods and airlines do not cook up a storm especially for you, just to delay you for another couple hours.

At the end of the day, airports are just like anything else and any place else in life, they are a place, an opportunity, where you can choose to seek out, find, and focus on the positive, or you can look for, create, and focus on the negative.

The choice is yours.

Whatever you choose, there is really only one choice that is going to truly leave you feeling happier and more fulfilled.

I humbly borrow a line from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, when I say this and encourage you to, "Choose, but choose wisely."

Carpe Diem,

Jesse