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Sunday, November 30, 2014

One Year Later... Remembering My Best Friend

Hi All,

With this being the one year anniversary of my friend Paul's passing, I wanted to say a few words. I will keep the text brief since I said pretty much everything I want to say in the video below.

I want to be clear: I choose to be happy, I work hard at it every day, and I also have my own personal struggles; just like you. I am human and when I feel, I feel very very deeply.  Happiness, Joy, Love, Laughter, Sadness, Frustration, etc... I feel all of it and I feel it all at equally deep levels when emotions are appropriate.

This last year has been a hard one.  I lost the two people I was closest to in my day to day life.  One of them, Paul, died a year ago today.

One thing I forgot to mention in the video is that Paul, in this last year, has taught me a great deal of patience. It is hard to lose someone you love, it is even harder when that person is someone the whole world wants to talk about. This last year there have been many times I have gotten pissed off and angry to the point where I have wanted to say or do something that is out of character for me.

Each time I feel my blood start to boil I take a breath and hear Paul's voice, "Jesse this is not you."

There have been times this last year I have not wanted to be me, but Paul has always reminded me to be me because me being me is what our friendship has been built on.  Me being me and him being Paul, not the actor, not the movie star, just Paul.

My personal life is very similar to all of yours.  It is one that is filled with all that comes with living a complete life: Love, Loss, Happiness, Sadness, Laughter, Hurt, Joy, etc...

My life is far from perfect and I do not want to mislead any of you in thinking that it is, nor would I want it that way.  The "hard stuff" of life does not happen to make our lives become hard.  The hard stuff happens to give us an opportunity to grow, to learn, and to make our lives better.

I hope you find value in this video as the message is one I believe in with all my heart.  If you do find value please share it with someone.  Here is a link to share:

I have also included links to donate to ROWW.  The following link goes to the fundraising page that I started for Paul's birthday.  It is my goal to raise $1,000,000 for Reach Out World Wide. I believe that we can reach that goal. Please donate by clicking here or using the link below.

Carpe Diem,


Here is the link to donate to ROWW:

Here is the link to the Sunrise/Sunset video from Paul's birthday:

Here is a link to the Facebook photo album on the 1 Year 1000 Challenge page that has all your photos from those of you who sent in ROWW donation confirmation pics:


  1. Thank you for sharing Jesse. I couldn't imagine how to even go about dealing with losing a best friend let alone one who the world loved and is constantly talking about! I'm happy to hear things are going well, I just wanted to say because of Paul I was introduced to you (well kind of) And I am forever grateful. You are such a strong and inspiring human being. You both were lucky to have had each other. Thank you for all you do.

  2. Powerful message! Thank you for sharing, your path to healing is very inspiring and an eye opener. Sending many hugs and strength your way during this difficult anniversary.

  3. I loved your video and thanks for sharing it, your are such an inspiring human being and I'm happy that I've found your blog and FB. I'm sorry for your personal loss and I'll send a little pry for you. I want you to know that you are very important to so many people around the world , don't you ever forget it. :)

  4. Jesse,

    Thank you for sharing this. You touched my heart. I have often thought about how hard it must be for you to be on Facebook daily and see so many profile pictures that were Paul. I imagine that it must be so difficult to see his face everywhere you look. I want you to know that I respect you and admire you for staying so strong and positive among all the constant reminders. Your outlook is amazing, and you inspire me on a daily basis. I am so grateful for you. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers always, but especially today for added peace and comfort. Much love.

  5. Jesse,

    That is such a beautiful video with heartfelt words. You know that all the important people in your life that have physically left are sooo proud of you. I too truly believe they are never gone! You are such an inspiration to so many people. The beautiful people you have lost are watching over you with a smile and saying how blessed they are to have you be such an important part of them. Those people and many many more will be forever grateful for the person you are!

  6. Jesse... you always share a view or perspective that makes me think....learn! I hope your day has found more peace than tears! It makes me so sad to know your sad :/ I can't even imagine having Paul for a friend. But you know he's probably proud of all you do to honor him!! Thank you for the video! Thank you for being human! Thank you for being amazing!

  7. Jesse,
    Wow! I can't believe how this was felt at my soul's core! Even though I have never lost anyone that close to me where i can honestly feel something as intense as that, I connected to what you said and it made me feel completely connected with you! You have a gift Jesse that I have never seen in anyone else before! You shine bright even at times of sadness and sorrow because you are honoring those that you love and respect! You are fulfilling your calling here on Earth to be that beacon of light to those that crave and need it! May this day bring you much peace and solitude knowing that you are living out your legacy so that Paul can live out his truly continue to make a difference in this chaotic world by sharing your insights and wisdom with us all! Thank you for showing us your true and authentic self today and seeing how real you are and that makes you so amazing!!! Much love and respect to you my dear friend! Always know that you are living your purpose and helping others to do the same!!! :)

  8. Jesse, I am so sorry that you have lost so many close people to you. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to mourn publicly because your friend is such a public figure.

    Thank you for taking time through your pain and the lessons you have learned to help others. Your message is powerful. I have lost some people I have known but none super close to me. I know one day I will and you can be sure that I will keep your words in mind. I already do. Even though I did not Paul, hearing about the great person he was and the wonderful things he did and how he treated others has already motivated me to live my life differently. I attribute that to the friend you are and the legacy you are helping him leave. My life goal is that one day when I leave this earth I have those closest to me live their lives as a reminder of the kind and loving person I aspire to be. I realize that this begins with me waking up each day and choosing to be that person. I need to choose how I react to circumstances, others and how I treat people.

    Thanks, Jesse for being such a great role model and for having such an impact. There are so many people that make a ton of money and have a lot of media attention but they are not positively impacting others. You are a beacon of light in a very self centered world : )

  9. Thank you everyone for sharing your thoughts, feelings, and insights. I have found value in, and appreciate all of them. :)