5 Common Misunderstandings that Will Ruin Any Relationship

Hi Everyone,

Recently I was asked to guest blog and the topic I was asked to write about is: "5 Common Misunderstandings That Will Ruin Any Relationship."

I wanted to make sure you had the chance to read it as well.  I have included it below along with a few links to helpful resources.

Please feel free to pass it along to your friends.

Relationships are the source of some of our most blissful, fulfilling, and pleasurable experiences when they are working; but when they are not, they can be the root of some of our deepest pain.

When our relationships are going well, we walk with a lightness in our steps, sunshine follows us everywhere, and the birds are always singing. When our relationships are not going well, we drag ourselves through the day with a dark cloud following us everywhere and the birds are nowhere to be found.

To minimize the pain and maximize the pleasure of your relationship, here are 5 common misunderstandings that will ruin any relationship:


* It is your partner's job to fix you.

As you go through life you learn how to fear, doubt, and form limiting beliefs about yourself and the world at large. This "stuff" of yours likely has negative consequences on your mental, emotional, and physical states - perhaps making you feel broken in some ways. It is not your partner’s job to fix you. The tools of love, while powerful, are not necessarily the tools that can ease fear, dispel doubt, and repair limiting beliefs. If you have “stuff” affecting your quality of life and your relationship, seek the help of a counselor, a coach, or a therapist. If you rely on your partner then you are adding a burden that the relationship was not meant to bare.

(Check out my program "Your Life Toolbox" to get an assortment of tools designed to help you live a happy, healthy, and fulfilling life.)


* Your relationship has space for your "baggage”.

Airlines limit your carry-on items to two and the more checked baggage you have, the higher the fee they charge you. There is a reason baggage is limited: There’s only enough room for two and in your relationship, that is You and Your partner. When you embark on new adventures go forth with only what you need and leave the rest behind. If you bring into your new relationship all of your past relationships and the mental and emotional turmoil they entail, you undoubtedly set yourself up for a challenging road ahead. Want your relationship to succeed? Then adhere to the wise words of "leave your baggage at the door."

(I have an awesome course on Self Love that can really help you with this.  Check it out by clicking here.)


* Assuming you are loved unconditionally.

I get it - I too was raised on the Disney inspired notion of happily ever after and the unconditional love that comes with it. But, after the handsome prince rescues the damsel in distress, they kiss, and ride off into the sunset have you ever stopped to wonder- what then? That's when the real relationship happens and the work to make it a lasting and fulfilling one begins. The biggest mistake I see couples make is assuming that their partner loves them unconditionally and that no matter what they say or do their partner will continue to love them. Unconditional, meaning without conditions, and yet you, me and everyone else has conditions that need to be met for our relationship to last and our love to flourish. If you really are in your relationship for the long haul, drop the fantasy and dig in to getting to know and understand your partner and what their conditions are. Once you understand those, you can make it your relationship mission to ensure those conditions are always met.


* Believing that how you show/express love is how your partner wants to be shown love.

In Gary Chapman's must-read relationship book "The Five Love Languages", Chapman discusses in depth the five distinct ways we show, demonstrate, or communicate love to our partners. The challenge couples face: how you show love and want to be shown love, may be completely different than how your partner show's love and wants to be shown love - in essence, you are speaking different love languages. Imagine going to China and trying to speak Greek... you may not get as far as you would like. Do yourself a favor and read the book "The Five Love Languages." Better yet, make it a mandatory reading for the relationship, and have a discussion about it before you go to bed each night.


* Relying on sex to solve the problems.

A friend of mine would often joke that whenever his relationships were in a rough spot he would just spend a little more time in the "Boom Boom Room" and everything would be OK. To date, he still hasn't found the long term relationship he wants. Sex has an important role in the relationship, but when that role starts to involve sweeping the problems of the relationship under the rug with the rest of the dirt, it is only a matter of time before the relationship and sex life turns sour. The rug can only hide so much so if you want a relationship that lasts, you have to make it a habit to clean under the rug - often. The cool thing is that the more you clean, the less there is to clean. I suggest setting a time, once a week, for a regular relationship check-up. During this time, you and your partner can talk about what is going great in the relationship and what you can improve upon. Making regular communication like this a priority will not only keep the space under the rug clean, it will also ensure that the sizzle stays in your sex life.

I hope you found value in this.  Please leave a comment below and let me know what you think.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

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Letting Your "It" Go

We all have an "it".

 

 And no your "IT' is not this one:

 

 

 

although "IT" might feel like that sometimes. 

"It's" are those things, thoughts, feelings, etc... that we hold onto and thus allow to negatively influence our life and the direction it takes.

An it can be a bad relationship, the time you were wronged, the lie a friend once told you, and many many more.

It's come in so many different shapes and sizes that it can be hard to recognize them and even harder to eliminate them.

One of the greatest gifts you can ever give yourself is the gift of freedom.  A freedom that can only come from letting your "it" go.

When we are free to think, feel, and choose how we want to live our lives, then we are truly alive.

Watch this short video below to learn more about letting "it" go.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge


Do you have an "it," you want to let go of?  Lets you and I set up a time to chat so you can learn how I can help you eliminate the "it" and the hold it has over you.  Click here to begin to let your IT go

It is Time To Get Rid of Your Expired Stuff

Honesty Time!! 

Have you ever let food go bad?  Have you ever forgotten about a piece of fruit, only to be reminded about it a week later because the smell of it become overwhelming?

 

When food expires it stinks and is no longer edible.  When the trash can gets to full it smells and it is no longer usable, thus it needs to be emptied.

 

The same is true for our life.  "Stuff" goes in and out of our lives.  If we hold onto the expired "stuff," we limit ourselves and our ability to move forward and enjoy life to the fullest.  

Much in the same way that if we only ate expired, rotten food, we not only would miss out on enjoying the taste of fresh food, but we probably would not last that long on that kind of diet.

In this short video below, I explain why it is so crucial that you get rid of the expired "stuff" in your life

 

Is there "expired stuff" you need help eliminating from your life?  How much longer are you going to keep it around for?  If you are ready to get rid of it now, once in for all, then click this link to set up a time for us to chat so I can help you.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge 

You Can Achieve Olympic Level Success

I hope you all got a chance to watch some of the 2016 Olympics.  I always admire not just the athleticism, but also the dedication that the athletes have.  As a kid I always wandered what separated Olympians from all the rest of us?  Was it talent, or was it something more?

What is the key to Olympic level success?  Why don't more of us achieve at Olympic levels?

In the short video below, I explain the key to achieving Olympic level success in any aspect of your life.

Here is to you achieving at new levels. 

2017 is rapidly approaching and if you would like to get a jump start on it or if you are determined to  creating significant changes in your life and/or business then please contact me here

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http:www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

Unlocking Your Greatness

Hey there!

I hope this blog post finds you smiling and enjoying life.

It is the morning after Unlock Your Greatness 2016 in Santa Barbara, California - what a special and transformational last two days it has been.

As I type this I am filled with this overflowing amount of joy and gratitude... overflowing literally (I am crying haha) reflecting on what myself and the amazing group of people experienced together the last two days.

Any time you enter into an immersive environment like UYG you know the potential for magic is there.  When the magic happens it always exceeds anything I could have imagined.

I consider myself honored to have had the opportunity to spend this time with an amazing group of people. I was treated to a front row seat as I watched people change right before my eyes. 

Limiting beliefs disappeared, emotional baggage that had been carried for far to long was let go of, love was abundant, pain's were eliminated, and new possibilities were unlocked.

On one of the breaks someone came up to me and said, "For so long I used to feel so much pain (towards a certain traumatic life event) now I can't even remember how to feel how I always felt."

Awesome!

My favorite part of the process - watching people become taller, literally physically taller.

As we let go of the things that weighed us down, we grow.

As we gain confidence and clarity, we grow.

As we discover purpose and unlock possibilities, we grow.

As we connect with love and let go of pain, we grow.

As we believe in ourselves and tap into the greatness that is inside of us, we grow.

What I would like to leave you with is one of the biggest things I was reminded of from this years Unlock Your Greatness:

When you decide to create change in your life, when you decide to live at a new standard, anything is possible.

To those of you who attended - thank you for giving me the opportunity to serve as your guide during this portion of your life's journey. 

To those who are going to attend in the future - I look forward to helping you grow taller and Unlock Your Greatness :)

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

You Have a Gift You Can Share with the World

Each and every single human being on the planet, including YOU, has an abundance of gifts.  These gifts come in the form of talents, skills, thoughts, ideas, and emotions among others.  

More importantly, each of You has the ability to share Your gift with another human being.

Imagine how much greater You can make another person's life by sharing Your gift with them.

Imagine how much greater the world could become if we all learned to be better givers of our gifts.

In this short video below I explain why it is so important and how You can share Your gift with the world.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

If you need some help unlocking your gift so that you can share it with the world, send me an email here.  We will get together and talk about what you can do right away to begin sharing your gifts.

Choosing Life Then Career

Hello Everyone!

I hope this blog finds you all smiling and doing your best to make this day a great one!

Awhile back I had an amazing conversation with a good friend of mine and I felt it was worth revisiting to share it with you all.  My friend, at the time, was 27 years old and is a true Entrepreneur.  After college he took out a huge loan, moved away from his friends and started his own business.  He has now started several other small businesses over the years.  The guy has an amazing work ethic, a good business sense, and the drive to succeed.

As we were chatting the other day he told me he was struggling trying to figure out what he wanted his career to be.  He has a ton of ideas, knows that he could be good at many jobs, but he is unsure about what is right for him.

I told him this, "Instead of focusing on what your career is going to be, focus on what you want your life to be like, then figure out a career that will support that."

The change in the language is a tiny one, the change it produces in ones' though process is HUGE!

So often we human beings live our lives according to what our job's allow.  If our job says we can only have 1 week of vacation a year we wait to take that one week of vacation.  If our job says we can only ever make "this much" then we focus in on that number and shut down the potential we all have to make more.  If our job says we are supposed to work at it for 30+ years until we retire, THEN we can finally start living life, we listen, we settle into the routine, and we look ahead to 30 years from now when we can start doing all the things we really want to do.

I am not saying the above is a bad thing because it is not.  And, it works really well for a lot of people.  The problem I do have with the above is it puts limits on our thinking.  It forces you to narrow your focus to the future and limits you from exploring the possibilities that exist around you at this very minute.  To give you an example:  Put your hands up to the side of your eyes, notice how your field of vision is reduced because your hands obstruct your peripheral vision.  You are left with the ability to see only what is right in front of you.  Now, if you take your hands down, you will notice that you can see all that is around you as well.  It is as if a whole new perspective just opened up for you.

When you get into the mindset of building your life around your job/career, your job becomes the focus, it becomes the driving force for what you do.  When your job is the focus, guess what, the hands go up to the side of your face, and your field of vision is reduced.

When you instead get into the mindset of building your job/career around your life, your life now becomes the driving force for what you do because it is now front and center, it is your focus.  Your hands come down from the side of your face and now you are able to see the world that is around you.

The world that is around you is where all the possibility lies.

I promise you, there are jobs out there that will support you living how you want to live.  I promise you that there are inventions out there that need to be invented that will give you the freedom you desire.  I promise you that there are opportunities out there that will let you live the lifestyle of your dreams, if you will just start challenging yourself by dreaming what you want your life to be like.

Most of us wish we could live life in a certain way, but we never challenge ourselves to start thinking about HOW we can live it in that way.

Focus on your life and what you want it to be like.  As you learn to do that, you will figure out a way to make it happen.

I would love to hear your thoughts, please share them below.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

What Does Your Fear Cost You?

Let me ask you a question, what is scarier... the thing(s) you fear, ex: heights, public speaking, taking risks, etc... 

 

OR 

 

Living your entire life allowing those fears to dictate each and every day of your life?

Which is scarier?

Is the moment you take the risk or speak in public scarier?  

 

Or 

 

Is it scarier to imagine a life filled with missed love, missed experiences, and missed opportunities.

Fear is the #1 dream killer.  Fear is the #1 belief limiter!  Fear is the #1 reason why so many people do not live the life they want to live.

What do Your fears cost You? 

I recorded a short video for you that talks about fear and just how much it will rob from your life if You allow it to.

 

 

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

 

http://www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

My clients are consistently able to face, defeat, and move beyond their fears.  If you want to face yours, I can help you.  Click here to learn more.

Six Years Later...

My Dad died on Monday February 1st, 2010.

I had the good fortune to speak with my Dad on Sunday January 31st, 2010.

I say good fortune because looking back on that day six years later,  I feel like I won the lottery having had the opportunity to speak with him just one day before his passing.

My Dad and I did not talk regularly - I held onto childhood baggage that I allowed to keep me at a distance.  Our relationship was alright, which I recognize is much better than the relationships many kids have with their parents.

I am grateful for much of my time I had with him and I regret some of the opportunities I wasted.

Looking back I can recognize and appreciate both my Dad and I did the best with what we knew.  The last couple years our relationship had started to grow because we both had chosen to begin to grow as people.

I have shared quite a bit about my Dad in various other blogs and videos.  I do not want to make this post as much about the past as I want to make it about the present.

I know with 100% certainty that my Dad loved me and in the end that is what is most important.

As I type this I find myself reflecting on some of the most significant life lessons I have learned since my Dad's death.


1 - Say I love you when you get the chance:

Had I known my Dad was going to die I would have said I love you over and over until my voice stopped working.  There were 1000's of day to day opportunities I let pass me by because I always assumed there would be another chance.  Imagine the chance you have right now is your only chance... let people know that you love them as if this is your only chance to tell them

2 - Give your parents a chance... let them be proud of you.  Your baggage isn't worth depriving yourself of love

Only reason I spoke with my Dad on January 31st 2010 was because I had been in Haiti early that month helping out with the earthquake recovery efforts.  My Dad was so excited and proud of me that he had emailed me that week a very thoughtful note telling me so.  I realized I hadn't gotten back to him so I decided to call.

There were countless times over the years I did not allow my Dad to be my Dad, to love me, to be proud of me.  I had my walls up, I justified every ounce of emotional baggage I held onto... you know the drill.

The irony of it was I would always circle back to choosing to feel like my Dad didn't care, didn't love me, or wasn't proud of me, I was resentful because he didn't "love me" the way I wanted him to, or at the times I wanted him to.  So because he wasn't doing it "MY WAY" I deprived both myself and him of experiencing a closer connection.

3 - Make the effort

I can appreciate wanting others to put forth the effort or not wanting to be the one "Always" having to make the effort.  I have been there and I have done that.

Trust me when I say this: when the people you care about die, you will wish you had made the effort.

4 - Tomorrow isn't promised

A phrase said so many times it often sounds cliche, but it is so true.  Today millions of people did not wake up who went to sleep last night planning to wake up.  At this very moment, people are being killed, dying of diseases, meeting their end because of a tragic accident.

All we are guaranteed is right now.  Please treat this moment as the gift that it is.  Ask yourself, "If this moment was my last, what would make it meaningful?"  Whatever your answer is, please do that.

5 - Forgive

Forgiveness is a biological gift we have all been given.  Tragically so many of us choose to never unwrap it.  Your life will only improve, the meaning of your life will only deepen, the love you experience will only grow when you forgive.

6 - Choose Love

No one ever said it would be easy and in a world where "being right," and someone else "being wrong" is sadly often valued in the moment more than love; love can be a challenge.

Send love towards others and most importantly choose to love yourself.  You are the one 24-7 relationship you will always have.

Nurture you, love you, and then love yourself some more.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

The Holiday Season - Reflecting and Planning for the Future

I don't know about you, but for me the holiday season is a time of reflection and planning.

Reflecting on the year I have lived, and planning for the year to come.

I hope you don't mind, I want to share some of the questions I ask myself to help me prepare for the year ahead.

If you feel like sharing your answers, I would love to read them in the comments below.

I hope you find value in this. :)

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

In 2016...


1 - What do I want to accomplish?
2 - Why do I want to accomplish this?
3 - What can hold me back from achieving this goal?
4 - What can I do now to address #3?
5 - How will accomplishing this impact my life?
6 - Is the accomplishing of this in alignment with my higher values?

I challenge you to ask yourself the above questions and dig deep, especially when you get to question #3.  That is the one that derails most people because they will often settle for an answer like "lack of time, or lack of money."  

If it is something you really want to accomplish, I promise you that if you fully commit to doing it, you will be able to find the time, and figure out the money part along the way.

P.S.

I have a weekly segment I post on the 1 Year 1000 Challenge Facebook page where I answer questions asked by the 1000 Challenge Community members.  Would it be helpful to you if I started posting those answers, along with other videos I do here, in this blog?

Making Dreams Come True

We all have dreams.

Tragically, not enough of us make those dreams come true.

The reasons "why" are many: "I don't know how," "it's impossible," "it's to hard," "I don't have enough money," "if only," etc... Do any of these sound familiar?

Over the course of its' four year life, this blog has been about a lot... dreams, goals, life, death, love, and the ongoing journey of living and experiencing life to the best of my ability.

I try to be open and share with you all in hopes that my candor may inspire you in how you choose to live your life.  In no way am I suggesting your life should look exactly like mine, what I am saying is that perhaps you can gain inspiration for your journey as you share in mine.

Recently my journey brought me to a day that I had dreamed of for years.  My first ever Jesse Brisendine live event!

Up to this point I had spoken to numerous audiences and organizations, been a featured presenter at corporate training's, and gifted with the opportunity to educate and inspire students at several High Schools and Universities.  This all was, and continues to be amazing (something I want to keep building on), however I had never hosted my own event.

Something that was uniquely mine in everything from the content, to the music, to the location, and most importantly the jokes (haha) all of it was "Jesse."

This had been a dream because I want to help people, a lot of people, live extraordinary and fulfilling lives.  To be able to help as many as I want to, I need a platform that allows me to interact and work with multiple people at once.  Enter Unlock Your Greatness - a program conceived by the idea to bring people together from all over the world to learn, to grow, to let go, and to move forward.

Last week (I cannot believe it has been a week already) I hosted the first ever Unlock Your Greatness (UYG) live event in Santa Barbara, California.

It was attended by folks from seven different countries and 15 different States.  If I had only one word to describe it, I would say WOW.

WOW... because I was proud of what I created, WOW because of the moments I shared with the participants, WOW because of the breakthroughs people had, WOW because of the feeling I had watching the attendees Unlock a Greatness that had always been inside of them, and was waiting to be let out.

I titled this post "Making Dreams Come True," because dreams can come true, but not because you wish them to, dreams come true because you make them come true.

Any great dream deserves a great amount of work and effort that goes into making that dream a reality. Most dreams will require 100's, maybe even 1000's of hours or more of hard work, commitment, sacrifice, and the proverbial "blood, sweat, and tears," to make them come true.

You know what?  I can happily tell you that it is and will be worth it when you realize your dream.

Unlock Your Greatness was the start of a new beginning for me; the next chapter in my professional career and life purpose.  UYG also was the culmination of 1000's of hours of hard work, study, sacrifice, decision making, life lesson learning, forward step taking, choice making, and life living.  All of it came together for two magical days in Santa Barbara, California. 

Below are some photos from the first event.  I hope to see you at a future Unlock Your Greatness, I am excited to share it with you. :)

Lastly, to all the people who made the journey to attend - thank you.  You all believed in me at the beginning.  I will always be grateful for that.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

P.S. What is one dream you have that you are committed to making come true?

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

International Sunrise & Sunset Day 2015

When I did the 1 Year 1000 Challenge, hands down my favorite of the over 1000 challenges/experiences I did that year, was an event I called International Sunrise and Sunset Day.



The 1000 Challenge community had grown to several thousand around the world.  I had the idea that it would be really cool if on one day, we all shared the sunrise and sunset together. 

The result was amazing! 100's of people from all over the world participated.  You can see that first video by clicking here.



In late 2013 my best friend was tragically killed. Being that he was a well known public figure, the world talked about him, a lot. 


As his birthday approached in 2014, I wanted to do something that would honor him for the man he was/is and not his job.  I decided to move International Sunrise and Sunset day to his birthday and have it be a celebration day and fundraiser for the his charity Reach Out World Wide.

The day was amazing!  Over $50,000 was raised and more than 3,000 people participated in the event.


This year I recently hosted the event.  Again over 3,000 people participated with 10's of 1000's of dollars being raised for Reach Out World Wide.




As I did in years past, I put a video together to commemorate the day which I have shared below.  I hope that when you watch the video, you take the message to heart and it adds an enormous amount of love and value to your life.

2015 Sunrise Sunset Day video

International Sunrise & Sunset Day is such a special event to me.  Not only does it mean a lot being able to honor my friend, I love the experience of so many people from all over the world coming together to share their sunrise and sunset. 

Even though we live miles a part, we are all neighbors here on Earth.  It was a joy watching the sunrise and sunset with You, neighbor.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

Did you participate?  What did you learn from the video?

P.P.S

The Sunrise and Sunset photo albums will be posted to the 1 Year 1000 Challenge page this week.

Random Thoughts

Hi All,

Some Random Thoughts... which I thought I would share with you all and see what your thoughts are on my thoughts?

What do you think?  You up for it?

1 - Bullying amongst kids would not be so prevalent if adult "role models" didn't use bullying tactics to try and get what they want/solve problems.  Ex: politicians focusing on what other candidates did wrong or won't do vs. what they will do to improve things. Mom and Dad yelling at the news hoping it will change what is happening.

2 - Why are books like the "Scarlet Letter"required reading?  Why aren't courses like a course on how to be happy taught in public school?  Is the Scarlet Letter (can you guess which book I did Not enjoy in High School? :)  ) more important to learn about than Happiness?

3 - Leadership is not always a friendship contest.  To lead means you are willing to say and do the tough things for the greater good, even if it means you may be removed from people's Christmas List.

4 - What would happen if we treated money the same way we treat all other pieces of paper?

5 - Part 1: There are 1,440 minutes and 86,400 seconds in every day... how many of them do you remember?

6 - Part 2: With all that time available for us to remember, why do so many chose the few "bad" seconds or minutes to represent the day?  How might the quality of a person's life change if they instead focused on the other 1,400+ minutes that were not all that bad?

I am looking forward to reading what you all come up with.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

Tuesday August 25th I will be teaching a course called 6 Weeks to Ultimate Self Love... you can join in by clicking here.

My 101 Life Time List

Several years ago I made a list of 101 things I wanted to do/see/experience/accomplish in my lifetime.

Recently I read a blog post by Jack Canfield where he shared his list and talked about the importance of creating a similar list.

The reason, Jack said, is because "the brain is a goal seeking organism."

Meaning that we need to feed our brain goals for it to focus on and seek out ways to accomplish.

After reading Jack's blog I was inspired to revisit my list.  When I did, I was pleased to see I had accomplished about 20 from my original list.

I've now created a new list.  This list includes many from my original list and quite a few new ones as well.





The goals are in no particular order.  I just wrote them as they popped up. :)

I hope the sharing of my list inspires you to make a list of your own.

What are some of your goals? 

Are you committed to realizing them?

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

1. Positively Impact the lives of 2 Billion people
2. Travel to every continent (been to four)
3. Travel to every State in the USA (30 so far)
4. Become a Master of my Thoughts and Emotions
5. Travel to at least 100 Countries  (18 so far) 
6. Speak at TED
7. Speak to a live audience of over 20,000 people (largest so far about 600)
8. Sit Ringside at Wrestlemania
9. Attend Men's World Cup
10. Attend Women's World Cup
11. Centre Court at Wimbledon 
12. 100,000 success stories from clients and various program participants
13. Meet with two in office President's of the USA and have conversations with them
14. Meet 5 head's of State from other Countries.
15. Walk the Great Wall of China
16. See the Northern Lights
17. Scuba Dive with Great White Sharks (in a cage)
18. Scuba Dive Great Barrier Reef
19. Scuba Dive the Red Sea
20. Stay in the houses on the water in Maldives
21. Host Unlock Your Greatness workshops in 50+ Countries
22. Help people from all over the world achieve 10 million + pounds of weight lost
23. Fly in a fighter jet
24. Create charity/scholarship to honor my Dad
25. Create charity/scholarship to honor Gabe
26. Climb the Seven Summits
27. Dive with Whale Sharks
28. Do the Rocky run and celebration up the Rocky Steps in Philadelphia
29. Attend Mr. Olympia
30. Write a bestseller 
31. Earn $10,000,000 in a year
32. Retire my Mom and provide for her so she can do things she enjoys
33. Compete in one bodybuilding/fitness competition 
34. Bench press 315lbs for 15 reps (made it to 13 one time)
35. Mud Run
36. Grow the Sunrise/Sunset around the World day into an annual event honoring Paul that raises a minimum of $250,000 a year for Reach Out World Wide
37. Grow International Trash Clean up Day to an annual event with over 50,000 people participating
38. Grow the One Billion Steps in March to an annual event where over One Billion steps are walked in the month.
39. Keynote speaker at a High School Graduation
40. Keynote speaker at a college/University graduation
41. Run for President (if, when the time comes, I would bring value to my country)
42. Speaking role in two Hollywood movies (one so far)
43. At least 3 published books (1 so far "Ouch My Heart is Broken")
44. Grow the 1 Year 1000 Challenge community to over 1million members.
45. Photo of a Sunrise and Sunset over all four of the Oceans (Pacific, Atlantic, 
46. Stay at the Absolute Suite in Cesar's Palace
47. Stay at the Skyline Suite at MGM Grand
48. Stay at the Hardwood Suite at The Palms
49. Give over 100 Million to charity in my Lifetime
50. Create a foundation that pay's for alternate forms of education for teenagers and adults (ex: personal training certification, yoga certs, etc...)
51. Visit where King Arthur is from
52. See all the Seven Wonders of the World (3 so far: Christ Statue, Colosseum, Machu Picchu)
53. See all Seven Wonders of the Natural World (2 so far: Harbor at Rio and Grand Canyon)
54. Dance the Tango in a Tux (True Lies style)
55. Run a Half Marathon in 1hr 40 minutes
56. Hold a plank for 10 minutes
57. Safari in Africa
58. Read/Listen to over 10,000 books/audio cd's
59. NLP Trainer
60. Do a language immersion course in the native country
61. Give a speech on leadership to Congress
62. Flight to Outer Space and Back
63. Earn over $300 million in my lifetime
64. Give over $100 million to charity in my lifetime
65. Pilots License
66. Compete on celebrity Jeopardy
67. Play in the main event at the World Series of Poker
68. Bowl a 300 game and 700 series (current highs 277 and 688)
69. Walking Lunges for over two miles without stopping (current best is 1.25 miles)
70. Workout with Arnold Schwarzenegger
71. Cut the ribbon at a ribbon cutting ceremony
72. Learn to Surf
73. Learn a Martial Art
74. Read Le Morte De Arthur
75. Attend a Robin Sharma workshop
76. Take a Cooking Class
77. Climb the Pyramids in Egypt
78. Kiss a special someone on top of the Eiffel Tower
79. Stay in a European Castle
80. Ring the Opening Bell on Wallstreet
81. Go White Water Rafting
82. Go on an African Safari 
83. Have a conversation with the Dalai Lama 
84. Drive a car at a speed of over 130 mph
85. Drive a Ferrari
86. Have a replica Round Table as a dinner table
87. Own a home with a secret passage way that leads to a kick ass game room 
88. Take a Dance Class and learn some rhythm 
89. Customized Carpe Diem license plate
90. Founder/Cofounder of at least two nonprofit charity organizations (one so far ROWW)
91. Create a system that is teachable to millions on how to help humans live thier bast lives
92. Forgive anyone that may have cuased me pain be it intentional or unintentional
93. Love and accept myself fully
94. Form a core group of friends to travel through life with
95. Own several vacation homes in beach and mountain locations 
96. Attend a dinner at the White House
97. Create multiple scholarship programs for future generations
98. Donor and advocate for animal rights
99. Take a photography class
100.  Master my thoughts and emotions
101. Have my photos featured in a major exhibit
102. Interviewed by Oprah
103. Interviewed by Ellen
104. Interviewed on one of early morning news programs (Today, Good Morning America)
105. 
     

Perspective is Everything

Recently one of the members of the Zero Limits Mastermind shared this video and I thought it would be of value to you.

Coca Cola advertisement aside it conveys a powerful message of just how much our perspective shapes our reality.

The video opens with the word prejudice and I encourage you to allow yourself to think of other words like: perspective, judgment, assessment, etc.. when you watch this video.

What we see is not always what is

What we believe is what will determine the reality we live in.

If you do not like your present reality, take a good long look at your beliefs.

Change your beliefs and you will change your reality.

What did you think of the video?

What did you learn?

How are you going to apply what you learned?

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

30 Days Sugar and Alcohol Free

Every year I challenge myself to abstain from alcohol and processed sugar, the stuff you find in sweets, candies, cookies, etc for 30 days.

I recently completed this challenge.

One quick update before I get to that:

I'll be hosting a 28 Day Fat Blaster challenge beginning in mid July.  I'll be posting more info about it on July 1st to the 1 Year 1000 Challenge page. I will also be sending out an email to let you know.  Make sure you are subscribed to my newsletter so you don't miss out.  Click here to subscribe

30 Days No Sugar No Alcohol

I am a pretty healthy guy, meaning I usually eat fairly clean (not a lot of sugary or fried foods) and I also enjoy treating myself every now and then to a few beers with friends or a sweet goodie ( cookies, doughnuts, cakes, etc...)

I also know that sugar is one of the most addictive substances out there.  Recent research has shown that sugar, on a chemical level, affects the limbic system in the brain (the part of the brain responsible for emotional control) in similar ways as some of the notoriously more addictive drugs out there like heroin.

When you hear words like heroin and sugar in the same sentence you might think: "C'mon Jesse, you are pulling my leg."

Think about this:

According to the CDC 38,329 people in the USA died from drug overdose in 2013.

Compare that to Sugar

Each year in the USA over 610,000 people, (according to the CDC) die from heart disease - Nearly 20 times more than drug overdose!!!

Leading causes: High Blood Pressure, High LDL Cholesterol, Overweight/Obesity, Poor Diet, Excessive Alcohol use, and physical inactivity

I once read a study that reported 96% of heart disease is preventable with healthy eating and exercise... 96%!!!!  That means that every year over 570,000 people die who would not have died had they taken better care of their health.

Tragic!

And what can be found in very likely 99% of unhealthy diets - SUGAR! 

What does sugar do to the body: Can lead to weight gain, cholesterol increases, high blood pressure, physical inactivity, diabetes, headaches, etc...

It is no longer a mystery that sugar is bad for us and the reason so many people continue to over indulge in it is largely due to its addictive properties.  People just want to "feel a little better."

The first few days without sugar and alcohol were fine

Around day 5-8 I would get random headaches. 

Day 8 - 12 were the cravings... I really just wanted a bite or a sip and I would often here "THE voice" trying to rationalize it in my head:

"Just one bite won't kill you,"  "You have done this before, you know you can do it again... you have nothing to prove."

After day 12 it was pretty smooth sailing and by the time I took my first sip of alcohol I had gone almost a full 6 weeks without booze and, as of this writing, still have not had a sugary treat (although I am in Las Vegas and might treat myself here).




Some of the things that helped me be successful were:

• cleaning out my kitchen and removing any temptations (here's a video I did on nutrition success)
• I told everyone I talked to about my goal, this gave me massive accountability 
• I adjusted my schedule to protect myself during the "vulnerable" times (times where I had most cravings/temptation)
• I made sure to readjust my focus, daily, on why I was doing this
• I had a clear goal

Over the 30 days these are some of the benefits I noticed from abstaining from sugar and alcohol:

• More Energy
• Thinking much clearer
• More focused
• Less distracted
• Stronger in workouts
• After Day 12, better overall mode
• Food tasted better
• Surplus in monthly budget from not spending money on drinks with friends
• Note: think about the average markup for alcohol in any bar/restaurant
• Reduced body fat
• Muscles looked harder and more vascular 
• More motivated to pursue other hobbies/activities
• Improved creativity with cooking

When the time finally came where I was ready to have my first sip of alcohol again... I wasn't really even looking forward to it.  I had it, I enjoyed it, and I did so because I still want to continue to enjoy the occasional beers with friends.  I love the good times and silliness that comes with it.

With that being said, I believe life is all about balance, and one thing I have taken away from this most recent 30 day challenge is balance is something that can be re-calibrated at different times in your life. Going forward, I am excited to establish my new balance, and enjoying the experience along the way.

What about you?  Have you ever done a personal challenge for yourself?  What did you learn while doing it?

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

Happy Fathers Day

Whether your Dad is/was the world's greatest Dad or was never in the running for Father of the year, your Dad is still your Dad and what he represents to you and your life going forward is up to you.

My Dad did not do everything right, he made a lot of mistakes, he wasn't good with money, he often thought of himself first, he didn't always want to play basketball or catch with me, and he loved me.

The most profound conversation, and the most open heart to heart one I ever had with my Dad came in 2007 after my girlfriend had broken up with me.

I was so devastated, so sad, so lost, and in so much pain that I was willing to drop all my silly walls I had put up to try and get help from anywhere I could, even my parents.

During one conversation with my Dad, my Dad told me, "Jess, you are the best person I know."

I will always remember that and I often keep it close to my heart when  making decisions in regards to how I want to live my life and what I want to contribute to the lives of others and world at large.

Whether your Dad is/was the world's greatest Dad or he was never in the running for Father of the Year, he likely taught you an important lesson or two about life.

What is one life lesson your Dad taught you?

How do you apply it to your life today?

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

www.jessebrisendine.com
www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

I recorded this video a couple months ago about my Dad, maybe you can relate with it.

To Take a Step Forward You May Have tor Comfort Zone

Hi Everyone!

Recently one of the team members in the Zero Limits Mastermind shared a great article on words of wisdom passed on from Business leaders to college graduates at commencement.  (You can read the entire article here)

As I read through, I noticed there seemed to be a common theme that these titans of their respected industries were trying to impart on the next generation: Take risks and pursue your passions.

The concept is not a new one - heck I would guess in a slow week I hear the above phrase no less than 10 times.

Yet for some reason while reading this article, I started thinking of my own journey and where I am at professionally at this moment.

I love helping people - it has been what I have wanted to do since I was a little kid, (aside from being a professional basketball player) and I want to be able to grow my ability to help people.

For that to happen, for me to move forward towards doing more of what I want, I have to be willing to put myself out there in a way I have not done before. Some might call this "taking a risk."

You see the old adage, "nothing changes if nothing changes," is so true. Change is constant in our world yet so often there is so much fear around change.

Earlier this year I took a massive step forward professionally by announcing I would be hosting my first live event called Unlock Your Greatness.  This was a huge step out of my comfort zone as it took me from an area I was totally comfortable in, working one on one with folks, and put me in a new realm of event planning, coordinating, and teaching to audiences of many.

I'll be honest, I was scared.  My biggest fear was "What if no one signs up... what if it is just me in the room and all I could hear is crickets chirping in the background (Do crickets even chirp?)."

I hemed, I hawed, I dilly dallied, I weighed the pros and cons, I tried to make every excuse under the sun of why now is not the right time; and it all almost worked except for I kept coming back to the one thing that was my trump card for all the excuses: my passion.

I kept asking myself if my life will ever be fulfilled at the level I want it to be if I spent my whole life not sharing my gifts on the level I know I am capable of.  The answer kept coming up no; and you know what?  That no was way way wayyyyyy more terrifying than the fear of the crickets that might be chirping.

I kept worrying that to move forward I had to risk giving up my comfort zone.  Then I stopped myself and reminded myself that the real risk was if I stayed put... how much of my passion, my purpose, my joy and happiness in life would I be giving up?  OUCH!

It is true, to move forward you may have to leave your current comfort zone behind.  What I might argue is the whole concept of "risk taking."

I believe the greatest risk in life is risk-less living.  I believe that far more pain awaits us if we never try than even if we do and fall flat on our faces.

We are meant to grow, to change, to evolve, and to move forward.  Ahead lies the fruits of our labor, the joy, the happiness, and the love we seek.

Where we are might be ok, but will it ever be great?

Hmmmm... Something to think about.

What are your thoughts?  I look forward to reading your comments.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

My fear about Unlock Your Greatness was quickly put at bay.  To date there are people from 8 countries and 15 different States coming.

There are still spots left and I would love for you to be a part of what will be a very special event.

After all, how often in life can you say, "I was there at the beginning?" :)

Click the ticket below to grab your spot.

Conversations with John Aspra The Epicurean Cowboy

Hi,

Today marks the beginning of a new journey that I want to invite you on.

The new journey...

I won't say too much here, at this time, as most is said in the video.

The video is 15 minutes and I really hope you watch the entire thing - it is important.

As you watch, allow yourself to reflect on your life and the life you have ahead. 

I will be greatly appreciative of your feedback and your help in bringing attention to this journey.

My intention is two fold, part 1 is stated in the video, and part 2 is to inspire those who this touches to live with purpose and passion.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

www.jessebrisendine.com
www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

Click here to watch the video in Youtube

Your Attitude Defines Your Reality

Hellllllo there!

I swear that whenever you need to be reminded of an important life lesson, life provides you with just that.

Before I explain, I just have one quick update to share with you.

Registration is open for Unlock Your Greatness!!! :) :) (Insert Happy Dance)



Unlock Your Greatness is my first live event that I will be hosting over two days this October in my hometown of Santa Barbara, California.

You have all seen my pictures from Santa Barbara so you know it is one of the most beautiful places in the world.  In addition to the SB beauty, I will be hosting an experience that I promise will be unlike anything you have ever attended before.  To learn all about Unlock Your Greatness and to register click here.  If you have questions about it, you can email me here.

Looking forward to seeing you in Santa Barbara Friday October 9th and Saturday October 10th.

Ok, life lessons....

April 15th is tax day here in the USA. I, waiting till the last minute to do my taxes off, like a responsible citizen (sarcasm), had just sent off my hard earned money to Uncle Sam and was on my way to the gym to "decompress" from the tax paying process.

As I was walking out the front door, I said aloud, "Phew, thank goodness I do not have to spend money on anything any time soon."

I got in my car, went to turn it on, and it would not start... I tried again, no luck, and the third time... it was not the charm.

I called AAA (emergency roadside service here in the USA).

When the tow truck driver arrived he tested my battery and said it was toast.  I asked him if it would make it till the next day (I was taking my car in to get it serviced) he said if I turned the car off it probably would not start back up.

Needless to say a new battery was needed.

To be perfectly honest, my first thought was something like "Fuck... I just spent all the Fu^king money on my F**king taxes and now I need to get a new fu@king battery."


After the above thoughts ran through my head, I thought to myself, "hmmmm I don't really like how those thoughts are making me feel."

Then I took a deep breath and tried again...

"Damn, I was really looking forward to not spending any money for awhile, and while this is not ideal to be investing in a battery right now, it is an investment and it will allow me to drive, for many days to come, free from fear of breaking down and being stranded.  And isn't that freedom worth this investment, now? Absolutely!"

I liked this second attempt at assessing the situation much much more.  I felt better thinking it and this prospective was much more empowering than my initial F-Bomb tirade that made me feel mad and victimized.

As the AAA serviceman installed my battery we got to chatting.  When he finished his work, he thanked me and told me that I was the most pleasant customer he had had in a long time.  He said that he really appreciated my kindness because usually people are not in the best mood's when he shows up and they often point the finger of blame at him for their car problems.

Hmmmmmm... I thought.  Isn't this interesting???

His thanks made me smile and it reminded me of an important life lesson:

No one decides our thoughts but us.  The decision of what goes on between our two ears is ours and ours alone.

If I would have stuck to my first initial F-Bomb tirade assessment of the situation I would have likely spent the rest of the day and beyond being upset at my poor luck.  I definitely would not have had a grateful tow truck driver thanking me for my kindness.  In fact, I may have had the opposite experience - a tow truck driver who left another job feeling not so great because he had yet another customer who blamed him for their problems

But, since I exercised self control, took a deep breath, and chose my thoughts carefully, choosing ones that would leave me feeling happy and empowered, I was able to:

• Laugh at the irony of the situation (not wanting to spend more money and immediately being prompted to spend more money).

• Be reminded of a life lesson that I could share with all of you

• Walk away from the experience feeling good with no negative emotional energy or thoughts lingering.

• And I was able to brighten another fellow humans day who showed his gratitude by thanking me which in turned brightened my day.

Always remember my friends, the thoughts you think create the reality you live in.  If you do not like the reality you are presently in, trying changing your thought process.

It may just be one of the best gifts you can give yourself.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge