Five Ways to Fight Feelings of Failure

Feelings of Failure Will Fuck You Up!

Now that we got that out of the way lets dive in.

I opened with a strong statement because this is not something to pussy foot around on. Failure, specifically our perception of it and the inevitable feelings that come with "THAT" perception, can really "F" things up if something is not done about it.

Failure is one of the greatest universal fears.

Whether it is failure in a relationship, failure at work, failure at money, failure with health, failure at winning the game, or/and failure in life... perhaps more than anything else, the fear of failure keeps people frozen and prevents the transformation of ordinary to extraordinary.

Speaking from personal experience, the fear of failure has been the source of more sleepless nights, more waking up with my heart racing, more self deprecating feelings, and more cold sweats than just about anything else.

If you have spent anytime wading in the failure pool you know that it is not a place you want to spend anymore time in (been there, done that, don't need the postcard). To help you out, here are five ways to fight feelings of failure.

#1 Exercise

What positive benefit about exercise have you not heard yet? It's good for virtually everything and fighting off feelings of failure is at the top of this list. Not only does it produce good feeling chemicals like endorphin's, engaging in it helps clear your mind, distracting you from the thoughts that feed feelings of failure, and at the end of it all you get a sense of accomplishment.

#2 Shift Perspective

We feed feelings of failure by focusing on a couple key things that we use as fuel for our feelings. Shift your perspective away from this to something you have done well.  Or, even better, shift your perspective outside of yourself to someone or something else.  This might be the perfect time to reflect on the one time you helped that friend who later came back and said that your kindness changed her life.

#3 Focus on Gratitude

You, I, and everyone else have so much to be grateful for. Everyday there are 1000's of things that have to go right just for us to stay alive.  Often when we are self consuming with feeling of failure we miss all that is going right all the time around us.  The roof over you head, the air in your lungs, your eyes and being able to read this (if any of those were gone, you may be willing to trade in some feelings of failure to have them back).

#4 Talk it out

If we do not express what is on our mind and heart then we will depress it.  The trash can can only hold so much before it starts to overflow.  Which is exactly why making it a regular habit of emptying out what's inside (the thoughts you are thinking and the feelings you are feeling) is imperative.  Often just having an ear to listen or some advice from a friend, a family member, or guidance from someone like a life coach, can be just what you need to get back on track.

#5 Analyze your Successes

It has been said that success leaves clues and if you are willing to go back and examine your successes you may very well find those bread crumbs of clues that map out exactly what you need to do to replicate the success. Everyone has done something that they can call a success. What separates those who can replicate it is they become students of their success and find those key actions they took to do it again.

I encourage you to really dig in and play around with these five ways to fight feelings of failure.  Doing so can radically transform your life.

Any questions, please leave them in the comments below.

If you want to dive deeper into this and trade in your feelings of failure for the success you desire, click this link to set up a strategy session with me.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

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Three Big Reasons Why We Choose Pain

Hey there!

Hope this blog finds you smiling at life right now.  If you aren't smiling, I hope this blog can be a tool to help you re-discover your smile.

Every week on my Facebook page I host a "Weekly Wisdom," talk where I teach a few tools/concepts/strategies to help you live your happiest, healthiest, and most fulfilling life possible.

In these talks I try to pick topics that I feel will serve and help you make profound changes and advancements in your life.

The video below is on "Three of the Big Reasons Why We Choose Pain."

Not to worry, I explain what I mean by pain early on - and if that statement "Why We Choose Pain," got you a little riled up, please watch this talk with an open mind - you will get much more out of it that way. :)

Any questions at all - please leave them in the comments below.

If this talk resonates with you and you would like some help on your journey forward, you can use this link.



Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

Merry Christmas 2016

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays

I hope this message finds you doing something you love.

I always enjoy the notions that come with the Holiday Season: giving gifts, thinking of others, peace on Earth, and goodwill towards others.

If we could embody these principals all the time, imagine what the world would be like :)

One thing I was able to appreciate this season is how much I enjoy Christmas lights (I mean I have always recognized that, but this year there was a little deeper appreciation).  In fact, I think I am going to keep them up and turn them on (often) year round.

What about you?  What have been some of your favorite memories and aha's from the 2016 Holiday Season?

Another special moment I wanted to share, very quickly with you:

As a kid Home Alone and Home Alone 2 became part of the Christmas tradition.  My favorite scene from the franchise has always been the scene where Kevin is standing in front of the Rockefeller Christmas tree in New York and is eventually reunited with his Mom.  I love everything about that scene: the setting, the sweetness, the Christmas revelations, and especially the music (I included a Youtube video below).

On a recent trip to New York I fulfilled a long standing goal of recreating that moment - something I have wanted to do for a long time. I still catch myself humming the song as I reflect back on that special moment. You can watch it here

Sending you lots of love, health and happiness. 

I hope our paths cross in 2017.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

I would love to help you get a jump start on 2017!  On New Years Day, I am hosting a live Goal setting training that you can attend for free!!  Click here to register.  So far we have folks from more than 13 countries participating. Hope you can be a part of it too. :)

Unlocking Your Greatness

Hey there!

I hope this blog post finds you smiling and enjoying life.

It is the morning after Unlock Your Greatness 2016 in Santa Barbara, California - what a special and transformational last two days it has been.

As I type this I am filled with this overflowing amount of joy and gratitude... overflowing literally (I am crying haha) reflecting on what myself and the amazing group of people experienced together the last two days.

Any time you enter into an immersive environment like UYG you know the potential for magic is there.  When the magic happens it always exceeds anything I could have imagined.

I consider myself honored to have had the opportunity to spend this time with an amazing group of people. I was treated to a front row seat as I watched people change right before my eyes. 

Limiting beliefs disappeared, emotional baggage that had been carried for far to long was let go of, love was abundant, pain's were eliminated, and new possibilities were unlocked.

On one of the breaks someone came up to me and said, "For so long I used to feel so much pain (towards a certain traumatic life event) now I can't even remember how to feel how I always felt."

Awesome!

My favorite part of the process - watching people become taller, literally physically taller.

As we let go of the things that weighed us down, we grow.

As we gain confidence and clarity, we grow.

As we discover purpose and unlock possibilities, we grow.

As we connect with love and let go of pain, we grow.

As we believe in ourselves and tap into the greatness that is inside of us, we grow.

What I would like to leave you with is one of the biggest things I was reminded of from this years Unlock Your Greatness:

When you decide to create change in your life, when you decide to live at a new standard, anything is possible.

To those of you who attended - thank you for giving me the opportunity to serve as your guide during this portion of your life's journey. 

To those who are going to attend in the future - I look forward to helping you grow taller and Unlock Your Greatness :)

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

Lessons Learned from 9 Years of Entrepreneurship

Hi!

Recently I hit a milestone professionally and I as I was reflecting back on it, I thought there were a few insight worth sharing.

September 3rd marked my ninth year of becoming an entrepreneur and making the decision to work for myself. Nine years, I cannot believe that!  I still vividly remember the day I walked out of my job as an employee for the last time. It was feeling that was both scary and liberating at the same time.

I remember waking up the next day and one of my first thoughts was: "Now what?"

In the nine years since my career has been filled with ups, downs, lefts, and rights.  I have traveled the world and have spent many a long days/nights/weeks/months in my bedroom or office trying to push things forward.

Entrepreneurship is not for the faint of heart, but I promise you this, if you heart is filled with a message to share with the world, and you are willing to be bold and ride the waves of uncertainty, there is nothing better, in my opinion, than calling your own shots, setting your own schedule, being your own boss, and walking your own path through life.


Lessons learned

Do it because you are passionate about it:

Life is way to short to do it for any other reason. No matter how long my days are or how much frustration may enter into them (yes I get frustrated and even pissed off at times) there is nothing else I would rather do.  Ask yourself this: at the end of your life would you rather sit on a mountain of money, but feel empty inside, or would you rather sit on a couple coins, but be filled with happiness, joy, and a ton of amazing memories? Pursue your passion and life will deliver.

It ain't easy:

As the saying goes, "If it were everyone would do it."  Lots of long days that meld into long nights. You often learn that just because you think you have a great idea doesn't mean everyone else does.  Restless nights, take out, paperwork scattered everywhere, odd hours, saying "no" to going out and hanging with friends, and instead saying yes to waking up early (7 days a week).  But heck, the time will pass anyways, right, so why not invest that time in the pursuit of what you truly want.

Make sure you have a strong stomach and are prepared for the swings:

I silly-ly (when you walk your own path you get to make up your own words) thought that I was going to be running the "Field of Dreams" of Personal Training (when I first started out) and Life Coaching Services.  "If I built it they would come," welllllll it doesn't always happen exactly like that.  At first you are often playing for an empty ball park, and while it may not be the most desirable outcome at the time, you know what, something magical happens when your customers do start showing up.  You learn to appreciate them that much more.  Not every season will be a winning season, the loses make you much more appreciative of the wins.

Put yourself out there:

One thing is for sure, nothing will happen if you do not share your gift with the world.  I long ago had the idea in my mind that I wanted to become a speaker and use my voice to share my message with the world.  The problem: I never had really spoken publicly or on video.  When my first website was set up (the original http://www.jessebrisendine.com ) I decided no better way to kick off my quest to become a speaker than to slap a video on my website for the whole world to see. I have now dug this video up (see below) to share with you.  We all start somewhere...

Believe in yourself:

In anything you do there will likely be skeptics and critics.  Something I learned early on is to always ask myself: "Does this person (the person who is doubting me) have everything in their life they want in this particular area?" 99.999999% of the time the answer was NO.  Often people will cast shade on what you are pursuing because you have the courage to pursue something they want, but are too scared to go after.  There will be doubters and naysayers along any path worth traveling.  Listen to them, you will never get to where you want to go.  Listen to your internal compass and it will lead you to your destination.

Learn to embrace people telling you "No."

We all are in "sales." Some of us may not directly negotiate a price, ask for a fee, or shake hands over a deal, but we are all "selling" ourselves all the time. I'm on the side where I offer services and for people to utilize those services they pay a fee to me.  In those exchanges (a customer has the opportunity to invest money in a service I provide) I have been told No far more than I have been told Yes. I won't lie, the initial No's hurt, but if you allow them to, they get exciting really fast because every "No," brings you one step closer to a "Yes." Keep pushing forward in-spite of the "No's," the "Yes's" need you!

Celebrate the little wins:

Often when we begin something new we want to hit a home run right out of the gate and given the choice between a home run and a single, who wouldn't choose the home run?  The home run is what brings the crowd to their feet, it is what makes the highlight reel on Sportscenter.  Life isn't always a home run, sometimes it is just stepping up the plate and giving your best effort. You won't always be at a 100%, but you can always give 100% of whatever you got that day.  When you step up to the plate don't swing for the fences every time, step up with the intention to give your best.  When you do that, celebrate the effort, take a breath, and evaluate how you can improve.

Life is to short not to go after what you want:

See above about Passion.  We have all heard it before and it is worth hearing again "Life is to short to be miserable."  If the work you do does not fulfill you, if the relationship you are in leaves feeling empty, if you go to bed a night dreading the alarm clock in the morning, something needs to change.  Your life is precious, you would not be here if that wasn't the case.  Treat your life like the treasure it is and you will find a world of wonder waiting for you.  Make the changes you know you need to make, life is to short not to.

Have a plan, but most importantly be prepared to work hard:

When I began working for myself I had a vague (at best) plan.  The plan consisted of crunching a few numbers and me showing up.  What I have learned is the best laid plans will often encounter challenges and no well laid plan will ever be a substitute for a relentless work ethic. Plans help with efficiency and give you guidance as to how to best focus your efforts, but at the end of the day nothing gets things done like an unbreakable work ethic.  When things get dirty, be prepared to roll up your sleeves and dive in.

Even as I type, I have more memories, ideas, and thoughts I could share with you, but I think I will save those for later and instead leave you with this:

Time will continue to pass, life will move forward, things will always change, 7+billion people are responsible for living their lives, and you are responsible for living yours.  If you do not like how things are going right now, be courageous enough to change it.  An amazing life is not given, it is created.

Carpe Diem and thank you for being a part of my first nine years,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

If you need help on your journey, and you would like me to be your guide to help you get what your heart desires, you can contact me here.  Note, this is only for those of you who are committed to living your greatest life. If you are content to settle and keep things as they are, please do not click on this link.

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The Power in Finishing What You Start

If I have been reminded of anything this last week it is just how fragile life is.  None of us are guaranteed a tomorrow, the only thing we have for certain is right now - this very moment!

And this moment you are in is a precious one, one that you should make every effort to treasure.  

With tomorrow not guaranteed it is of utmost importance that you leave nothing to chance that you give it your absolute best today because you may not get the opportunity to later.

On that same note... so often in life we begin on projects, ideas, goals, ambitions, yet we never see them to completion.  Why?  Why do we not finish the things we were so excited about when we started?  Why is it that when things get tough, an obstacle arises, we give up instead of pushing forward?

This time of year is a notorious "give up" time.  It is the time so many say "the heck" with it and justify their decision by saying "well when January rolls around that is when I will really focus on X, Y, and Z."

January is not promised and because of that little fact about life it is imperative that you make it a priority, now, to finish what you start.

In this short video below I talk about how important this is and why not completing something can lead to a lifetime of setbacks and unfulfilled dreams.

 

 

Your life is to short and to precious not to live it at your absolute best.  If you find yourself coming up short at the finish line, or unable to push through the barriers that are holding you back, then you and I should talk.  I'll help you get there!

To set up a time to meet with me, click the link here, fill out the shot form, and pick a time that works best for you.  It's that simple.

Looking forward to you finishing what you start.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

You Are Never to Young to Start Dreaming

You have heard all the phrases, "Dream Big," "If you can dream it you can achieve it," and so on.

Dream quotes, dream expressions, dream sayings... lets face it, they are everywhere.

As a kid one of the first dream statements I can remember is Martin Luther King Jr.'s " I have a Dream Speech."

Why is the "Dream" expression such a powerful one?  What is it about telling someone to go after their dreams that makes the statement so much more powerful vs saying go after your goals?

Would Dr. King's speech have had the same impact on us if he would have replaced the word "dream" with the word "goal?"  I don't think it would have.  I have a goal just does not have the same ring to it as does I have a dream.

You see dreams are something we can all relate to.  And they are something we all had well before we even had words.

Many of us get shy when it comes to setting goals, we believe we can't achieve certain ones and we are not deserving of others.  With dreams we do not limit ourselves.  We can dream the biggest dreams without fear, without judgement after all... it is just a dream right?

I believe that having dreams, big dreams, dreams for what you want in life, dreams for what you want to achieve are so so so important.

I also believe that You are never to young to start dreaming those dreams.



A couple years ago I recorded a video about the importance of dreaming and making those dreams come true.

As I re-watch the video today I am thankful that I started dreaming about being a speaker and coach long before I did it. 

What is a dream of yours?

What action can you take, today, to move towards that dream?

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

Six Years Later...

My Dad died on Monday February 1st, 2010.

I had the good fortune to speak with my Dad on Sunday January 31st, 2010.

I say good fortune because looking back on that day six years later,  I feel like I won the lottery having had the opportunity to speak with him just one day before his passing.

My Dad and I did not talk regularly - I held onto childhood baggage that I allowed to keep me at a distance.  Our relationship was alright, which I recognize is much better than the relationships many kids have with their parents.

I am grateful for much of my time I had with him and I regret some of the opportunities I wasted.

Looking back I can recognize and appreciate both my Dad and I did the best with what we knew.  The last couple years our relationship had started to grow because we both had chosen to begin to grow as people.

I have shared quite a bit about my Dad in various other blogs and videos.  I do not want to make this post as much about the past as I want to make it about the present.

I know with 100% certainty that my Dad loved me and in the end that is what is most important.

As I type this I find myself reflecting on some of the most significant life lessons I have learned since my Dad's death.


1 - Say I love you when you get the chance:

Had I known my Dad was going to die I would have said I love you over and over until my voice stopped working.  There were 1000's of day to day opportunities I let pass me by because I always assumed there would be another chance.  Imagine the chance you have right now is your only chance... let people know that you love them as if this is your only chance to tell them

2 - Give your parents a chance... let them be proud of you.  Your baggage isn't worth depriving yourself of love

Only reason I spoke with my Dad on January 31st 2010 was because I had been in Haiti early that month helping out with the earthquake recovery efforts.  My Dad was so excited and proud of me that he had emailed me that week a very thoughtful note telling me so.  I realized I hadn't gotten back to him so I decided to call.

There were countless times over the years I did not allow my Dad to be my Dad, to love me, to be proud of me.  I had my walls up, I justified every ounce of emotional baggage I held onto... you know the drill.

The irony of it was I would always circle back to choosing to feel like my Dad didn't care, didn't love me, or wasn't proud of me, I was resentful because he didn't "love me" the way I wanted him to, or at the times I wanted him to.  So because he wasn't doing it "MY WAY" I deprived both myself and him of experiencing a closer connection.

3 - Make the effort

I can appreciate wanting others to put forth the effort or not wanting to be the one "Always" having to make the effort.  I have been there and I have done that.

Trust me when I say this: when the people you care about die, you will wish you had made the effort.

4 - Tomorrow isn't promised

A phrase said so many times it often sounds cliche, but it is so true.  Today millions of people did not wake up who went to sleep last night planning to wake up.  At this very moment, people are being killed, dying of diseases, meeting their end because of a tragic accident.

All we are guaranteed is right now.  Please treat this moment as the gift that it is.  Ask yourself, "If this moment was my last, what would make it meaningful?"  Whatever your answer is, please do that.

5 - Forgive

Forgiveness is a biological gift we have all been given.  Tragically so many of us choose to never unwrap it.  Your life will only improve, the meaning of your life will only deepen, the love you experience will only grow when you forgive.

6 - Choose Love

No one ever said it would be easy and in a world where "being right," and someone else "being wrong" is sadly often valued in the moment more than love; love can be a challenge.

Send love towards others and most importantly choose to love yourself.  You are the one 24-7 relationship you will always have.

Nurture you, love you, and then love yourself some more.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com

http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

To Take a Step Forward You May Have tor Comfort Zone

Hi Everyone!

Recently one of the team members in the Zero Limits Mastermind shared a great article on words of wisdom passed on from Business leaders to college graduates at commencement.  (You can read the entire article here)

As I read through, I noticed there seemed to be a common theme that these titans of their respected industries were trying to impart on the next generation: Take risks and pursue your passions.

The concept is not a new one - heck I would guess in a slow week I hear the above phrase no less than 10 times.

Yet for some reason while reading this article, I started thinking of my own journey and where I am at professionally at this moment.

I love helping people - it has been what I have wanted to do since I was a little kid, (aside from being a professional basketball player) and I want to be able to grow my ability to help people.

For that to happen, for me to move forward towards doing more of what I want, I have to be willing to put myself out there in a way I have not done before. Some might call this "taking a risk."

You see the old adage, "nothing changes if nothing changes," is so true. Change is constant in our world yet so often there is so much fear around change.

Earlier this year I took a massive step forward professionally by announcing I would be hosting my first live event called Unlock Your Greatness.  This was a huge step out of my comfort zone as it took me from an area I was totally comfortable in, working one on one with folks, and put me in a new realm of event planning, coordinating, and teaching to audiences of many.

I'll be honest, I was scared.  My biggest fear was "What if no one signs up... what if it is just me in the room and all I could hear is crickets chirping in the background (Do crickets even chirp?)."

I hemed, I hawed, I dilly dallied, I weighed the pros and cons, I tried to make every excuse under the sun of why now is not the right time; and it all almost worked except for I kept coming back to the one thing that was my trump card for all the excuses: my passion.

I kept asking myself if my life will ever be fulfilled at the level I want it to be if I spent my whole life not sharing my gifts on the level I know I am capable of.  The answer kept coming up no; and you know what?  That no was way way wayyyyyy more terrifying than the fear of the crickets that might be chirping.

I kept worrying that to move forward I had to risk giving up my comfort zone.  Then I stopped myself and reminded myself that the real risk was if I stayed put... how much of my passion, my purpose, my joy and happiness in life would I be giving up?  OUCH!

It is true, to move forward you may have to leave your current comfort zone behind.  What I might argue is the whole concept of "risk taking."

I believe the greatest risk in life is risk-less living.  I believe that far more pain awaits us if we never try than even if we do and fall flat on our faces.

We are meant to grow, to change, to evolve, and to move forward.  Ahead lies the fruits of our labor, the joy, the happiness, and the love we seek.

Where we are might be ok, but will it ever be great?

Hmmmm... Something to think about.

What are your thoughts?  I look forward to reading your comments.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

P.S.

My fear about Unlock Your Greatness was quickly put at bay.  To date there are people from 8 countries and 15 different States coming.

There are still spots left and I would love for you to be a part of what will be a very special event.

After all, how often in life can you say, "I was there at the beginning?" :)

Click the ticket below to grab your spot.

A Very Candid Interview with Jesse Brisendine

Hi All,

You asked for it, here it is... a very candid interview with my good friend Macie Berlin.

If you read any of January's blogs, you will remember Macie as she wrote a very popular guest blog about me.  Click here to check it out.

Before we get to the interview, I wanted to share one quick update.

I should have a website up for the Unlock Your Greatness event by the first week of May.  This site will have a ton of info about the October event: what to expect, how to sign up, etc... I will keep you posted.

Can I just say how excited I am for my first Live Event!  I really appreciate all the love, support, and enthusiasm from all of you.  I am extra excited to welcome many of you to Santa Barbara in October. :)

The Macie Interview.

A few weeks ago I asked you all what questions you would like to see Macie ask me.  She picked three of them, and well, I won't spoil the interview, you are going to want to watch for yourself.

What did you think of the interview?  Would you like to see more interviews like this?  Leave Macie and I a comment below.  We would love your feedback.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

http://www.jessebrisendine.com
http://www.facebook.com/1year1000challenge

A Simple Idea

I really hope you all take a few minutes to read the following blog that Katie put together for us.  It talks about a simple yet VERY powerful strategy that each and everyone of us can use to make a positive impact in our lives.  Read on.

Carpe Diem!



I’m a big advocate of working out first thing in the morning, but lately my morning activity consists of walking downstairs to the coffee maker and straight to the couch catch up on news. I know getting myself to the gym after work will be tough, but I look forward to it, and use any breaks I have to come up with a creative workout that will make the time pass quickly. Then, right around 2:30, the plug is pulled and all my energy swirls down the drain. I can barely keep my eyes open and I start coming up with excuses to not hit the gym. I try to think how good I’ll feel afterward, check in with other friends about workouts they’ve already completed, read over my workout again, and visualize myself there. I usually end up going and am always glad I did, because to me, simply being tired is a pretty lame excuse not to stick to my health goals.


I can’t remember exactly how I came across this article, but it’s very possible that I was googling (if that’s not a real word yet, it should be) how to motivate for the gym around 2:30 in the afternoon. It’s called “A scientific guide to saying no: how to avoid temptation and distraction,” and you can read it here. It talks about a scientific study, the outcome of which varied greatly depending on HOW people said no to things like desserts and skipping exercise. Differences were recorded when people said “I can’t” versus “I don’t.” Think about the connotations of those words. The article describes “can’t” as limiting and restrictive, whereas “don’t” is empowering, a choice we are making. It got me thinking about the way I avoid things I know aren’t good for me, and I’m definitely going to try this out. Try it for a week and report your findings. It’s too simple not to!


Best,


Katie

The Greatest Changes Happen in an Instant

On Tuesday I had a 6am flight out to Arizona.  I wanted to get a workout in which meant I would have to be at the gym by 3:30am.  This meant I needed to get up by 2:45am to get ready.  When my alarm went off I laid there for a moment and thought: "I could so easily go back to sleep right now.  No one is forcing me to wake up.  I can always workout tomorrow."

Suddenly a thought popped into my head:  "the difference between those that succeed at anything in life and those who do not is the actions they take during the moments they do not have to."  Successful people, whether they are successful at business, or relationships, or their fitness; consistently make those moments moments of decision and then they take action that supports that decision and moves them forward towards their goals.  Unsuccessful people, when they experience those same moments, choose not to act and make those moments moments of indecision thus keeping them right where they are - always just out of reach of their goals and dreams.

The workout I had was not a life changing one, but the behavior I practiced, the honoring of the commitment I made to my health and fitness - that is where the true life changing behavior comes into play.

If I would have turned the alarm off instead would that really have been such a bad thing?  No not at all.  After all me skipping one workout is not going to kill me.

The challenge comes from the behavior of skipping the workouts of letting myself off the hook from a commitment I had made earlier to myself - that is where the real challenge arises.

If I let myself off with the excuse of: "I am really tired so it is ok to skip today." How much easier does it make it for me to use that same excuse again the next day?  Or the day after that or the day after that? Pretty soon that one, little, seemingly innocent excuse, picks up so much momentum that it becomes the proverbial snow ball rolling down the hill - getting bigger and bigger and bigger with each rotation.

Think about it... think about all the times in Your life that You have declared that You are going to make a change, "that it is time to change a few things."

Perhaps once upon a time you decided that you were going to wake up an hour early every day to work on your goals.  You did it with regularity for a week and then the day come where you felt "to tired," and you hit the snooze button.  The next day you may have gotten up early again, but something was missing - the momentum and enthusiasm that came from the previous week's consistency.  So you have an uninspired early morning session and resolve that things will be back to normal tomorrow.  Well tomorrow comes and it is time to get up and THE Voice pops into your head and says, "it is ok you did good yesterday, you can sleep for a few more minutes.  After all you have already skipped a day before and nothing bad happened."

That "You already skipped a day before," becomes the new fuel for the fire of justifying why you should be able to get a little extra sleep.  This process repeats itself over the next couple weeks until eventually you throw your hands up and say, "I tried, I am just not a morning person."  And with that you put your ambition and the goals that came with them to bed so that you can get that extra hour sleep in the morning.

Sound familiar?

Anyone ever followed the above formula for an exercise program?  How about a similar program where you have resolved to improve your relationship with your spouse?  What about a healthy eating program?

I can go on and on with examples, but I think you get my point.

Here is the reality that we all share: change happens in an instant for better or worse it is going to happen.  How it happens is decided by you.  You choose in those moments of decision or those moments of indecision how you want your life to play out.  Do you want it to be a life of change or a life of the same?

When you come to those moments, ask yourself "Why am I doing this, what is the real reason?"

Example:  If the reason you are getting up at 5am is to accomplish your goals and pursue your dreams, tell yourself exactly that!  When the alarm goes off, say: "the reason I am getting up now is because I am committed to changing my life and during this hour I am going to accomplish: x,y, and z!"

(Below is a picture of how I have my alarms set up on my phone.  It helps me remember my purpose and the reason why I am waking up in the early morning hours.  Having a purpose beyond myself gives me added accountability to getting up and doing what I need and want to do.)

That is a much more powerful purpose for waking up than saying something like: "Uggh I cannot believe I have to get up at this un-Godly hour to work on these stupid goals."

Which statement is going to be the one to get you out of bed and get you going?

Remember change happens in an instant.  The moments that can and will shape Your life are all around You.  How You choose to act in these moments will largely be determined by the purpose with which You approach these moments.

Going forward, what are You going to do?  Are You going to approach these moments of decision with a purpose, or are you going to hit the snooze and let another precious day of Your life slip by?

I believe You can accomplish and achieve extraordinary things in Your life when You make the decision to do so.

What are You going to do?

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

Share Your Story to Inspire Others

Hi Everyone!

Over the last month, I have been really honored to have the opportunity to speak at quite a few of the local Santa Barbara High Schools and Jr. High Schools.  It has been a really fulfilling experience for me to share my story with students and inspire them to make choices that will help them to live their dreams.

Each of the talks I give are about 45 minutes to one hour long.  I am not telling them any sort of hidden secret or anything like that.  I am simply sharing my story and I weave it into a theme about choice and the power of it. 

One of the points I hit home again and again and again to students is that we all always have a choice.  We may  not be able to choose some of the events that happen to us, but we can always choose how we handle, how we deal with, and what we ultimately choose to make of those events that happen.

Stories, I believe, are one of the most powerful tools we have.  And it is a tool we all have at our disposal, as WE ALL have a story to tell!  How we choose to tell our story is where the real power lies.  Do we choose to tell the story from the point of view of victim?  Or Victor?!

What do I mean by that?  Well it is the perspective you choose to tell your story from that matters the most.  You can choose to focus on all the wrongs and the injustices that the world has shoved upon you, or you can choose to focus on all the amazing life lessons you learned from those experiences.  The story is the same, what changes is the perspective you tell it from.

The video below really illustrates this concept.  The video is about a kid named Zach, who recently died from a form of bone cancer.  He was 18 years old.  Rather than feeling sorry for himself and be angry at the world, he chose to really make the most of his time and live and love to the absolute best of his ability.  His story has now gone viral (not viral enough in my opinion) and has appeared on news casts, facebook pages, etc...

The video is about 20 minutes long and worth every second of it.  I cried while watching it.  I did not cry because it was so sad he died, I cried because it was so moving to watch someone exist who really got what life is all about.

While you are watching this video, think about what your story is.  What have you learned from it.  How can you use your story to inspire others?  Please share your thoughts, your stories, your insights below.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

Play Ball

It is so crucial to have goals, but what happens when your goals get so big that they intimidate you and keep you from moving forward.  What are you going to do, how will you handle it.

I encourage people to dream big, but then I encourage them to break those big dreams down into steps.  Make smaller dreams out of your big ones, this will make reaching those dreams much more obtainable.

Check out this video I recorded for you to learn more about how to effectively do this and why it is so important.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

And if you need a little extra motivation and have not seen it yet, or you want to watch it again! Check out this video I made :)

Feel the Burn (out)

Feel the Burn(out)

This week started out rough. I’m fairly certain I overdid it on the physical activity over the past weekend. Between a Saturday morning circuit class, running around like a mad woman during a two hour soccer game the same day, and then attempting a training run the next morning that I had to cut short, I was totally spent. I was excited about all this planned activity, thinking how great it was to be burning all these calories, but not thinking about how it would affect my body, mind, and ability to get through the rest of the week.

I took Monday off, but Tuesday morning was the first time in for as long as I can remember that I didn’t have fun working out with my regular group. I know rest is important, but I’m starting to realize how much, and hopefully you know or can learn too. I still struggle with the “feeling guilty for taking a day off” thing, but how bummed would I be if I got a serious injury that put me out for a month, or six? I’d be super miserable, and would probably take to hibernating.


Proper rest and recovery days require a bit more effort than sitting on the couch eating peanut butter from a jar. I’m not an expert, but I know when I use my foam roller it makes a world of difference in my level of soreness and recovery time. Same with staying hydrated, stretching, icing and heating, and low impact activity like hiking or pilates during your down time. You want to feel fresh and excited to work out again, not dread it because you also gave your diet a day off and binged on pizza.

Here is a great article I found by Jeff Kuhler that breaks down proper recovery technique very simply.

http://breakingmuscle.com/mobility-recovery/7-essential-elements-rest-and-recovery#.UVSIZu_HI78.email 


This stuff works and you’ll be physically and mentally stronger because of it.


Happy Reading!

Katie

What makes you happy

An Idea and a Book



Jesse writes a lot about why finding what makes you happy is a cornerstone of building a good life. When you’re happy with yourself or certain aspects of your life, decision making becomes easier, you have more fun, you are more social, and more eager to take on new challenges (these ideas comes from observation and personal experience). But, are some things we THINK will lead to happiness, e.g., more money, having more fun, a body like hers... really the way to make it happen?


I recently met with a well traveled friend who told me about her experience trekking in Nepal. Nepal was awesome and eye-opening she said. Eye-opening because of how poor the country is, but also because the Nepalese people she met were all SO happy and kind, even though they have nothing. This stuck, and I did a quick inventory of my life in the present. I’m sitting in a sunny cafe, eating my $15 meal with friends, feeling great post-workout. What was I just complaining about an hour ago?


More to the point, I think some of us might be measuring our happiness against ideas, activities, and people that only offer a fleeting sense of the real thing. My Dad gave me great book by Dennis Prager called Happiness is a Serious Problem that explains just this. I’m not gung-ho on self-help books (I find most too repetitive and preachy), but this one is definitely worth a look. Prager talks about how happiness is a process we are obligated to work at. The “problem” is how we go about finding happiness in unhealthy and ineffective ways. He breaks down life into categories like work, fun, relationships, and family, and explains exactly what behaviors cause dissatisfaction in those areas and how we can change them. Being aware of and evaluating when these behaviors occur and why they do can help achieve happiness that will last.

If you’ve got the curiosity to pick up this book, I’ll make it easy for ya:

http://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Is-Serious-Problem-Nature/dp/0060987359/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1363233686&sr=8-1&keywords=happiness+is+a+serious+problem


Has anyone read this, and what did you think?


All my best,

Katie

Extreme Shoe Trends: Weird, or Worth a try?

Let’s veer away from mental and emotional health for a minute...

But before that, a few updates:

1 - One of my goals this year is to provide 10x Value in everything I do.  I want to make this blog more of a resource, a better tool for you to use.  One of the ways I plan on doing this is to start inviting guest bloggers to post blogs here.  I feel they will provide valuable info and insights into areas that I am not as knowledgeable or insightful.  It is going to be a great opportunity for all of us to learn.

2. - If you have not signed up for the Flat Belly Challenge, you had better sign up soon.  There are only a few spaces left.  This program will sell out.  More details can be found here:

3 - I am planning on putting out more Youtube videos and as I said before, more blog posts.  I will not be posting everyone of these on the 1000 Challenge page as I do not want to make that page too busy.  Also I want to really start directing content towards the people who want it.  So, if you like the blogs and do not want to miss one, be sure to subscribe at the right.  And if you like the Youtube videos, please click here to subscribe to my Youtube page.

Ok, back to those Extreme Shoe Trends...

Exercise has become a pop culture trend and is chalk full of sub-trends, if you will. One trend I’m sure many have questions about is athletic footwear. There are some strange looking shoes out there now, some of which claim to change your bio-mechanics, or how your body moves naturally, with constant wear and proper use. If you’ve ever had a running coach, you know there is a “correct” way to walk or run to minimize the risk of strain and injury. Can a shoe really help change this? Here are two of the more “interesting” footwear options on the market today that claim they can:

FiveFinger Shoes – This shoe is for athletes and runners of all levels who are looking for a different “feel” while running. FiveFinger shoes have the same minimal padding throughout the sole versus a traditional shoe with most of the cushioning on the heel, and pockets for each toe to best mimic the sensation of being barefoot. Vibram (Vibram FiveFingers Trek Hiking Shoe ), the manufacturer, claims that wearing this shoe while following a proper training regimen helps force a change in the way your foot strikes the ground. By changing the natural heel to toe foot strike to a forefoot strike (the ball portion of your foot hits first), the harmful impact when your foot hits the ground is lessened, reducing risk of injury and strengthening the lower leg and foot. If you want to get an idea of how these feel, simply take a jog around the block, barefoot!

Hoka Shoes – This is a brand new shoe, and pretty much the polar opposite style of FiveFinger. Hokas are also for athletes and runners of all levels, but for those wanting a super cushioned, bouncing, and weightless sensation under their feet. The soles are shaped like rockers, with the thickest point under the mid-foot to promote a mid to forefront foot strike. Hoka shoes were designed by two avid trail runners looking for a solution to the uneven surfaces, strain of uphill to downhill running, and foot fatigue after long distances on trails. To give you an idea, the soles of Hokas are 1.5 inches thick and use foam that is even softer than traditional running shoe cushioning. The sole width (side to side) is also enlarged to provide more stability. Sounds like a lot of shoe, right? Hoka shoes also claim to be at least 15% lighter than the average running shoe.

What do you think of the Extreme Shoe Trends?  Which shoe is your favorite?  Please share your thoughts below.

Here’s where I got my info, and you can too:

 www.vibramfivefingers.com 

www.hokaoneone-na.com 


Carpe Diem,

Jesse

The Talk Test

As I am writing this, it is a little less than 24 hours away until I open up the Fat Eradicating Challenge for you all to participate in!

I am so excited for you to try out this program.  Who is eligible you might ask?  Anyone who is tired of having the "spare tire" hang over their pants.  Anyone who feels self conscious in a bathing suit.  Anyone who wants to lower their blood pressure and cholesterol.  Anyone who wants to live a healthier happier life.  Anyone who wants to have more energy to play with their kids.  Essentially anyone who wants to and is committed to Eradicating their body fat is eligible for this program.

I have tested this program out with numerous clients and it works!  The details will come out in my newsletter tomorrow.  Make sure you don't miss out, click here to sign up to my newsletter.

One of the most common questions I hear in my Fitness life is, "Jesse, when I do cardio how fast/how hard am I supposed to train at?  What is the best heart rate for me to be at?"

My first answer is always, "well, it depends on your goals."

After that my second answer is always the following recommendation, "I personally believe the "Talk Test" is the best way to gauge workout intensity for the average person who wants to be healthy and reduce body fat." 

What is the "Talk Test?' 

The talk test is a simple test that requires no equipment to perform and is always accurate. 

You begin by doing your cardio training of choice: running, walking, exercise bike, etc...  and from there, you start talking.

If you can carry on an uninterrupted conversation where it does not sound like you are even breathing hard, then guess what - YOU need to up the intensity.

If on the other hand you are working so hard that you cannot utter a couple of coherent words, then you might want to consider slowing down just a tad, as this intensity is going to be very hard to sustain over a cardio session of 20 - 30 minutes

The sweet spot is when you are huffing and puffing, but can still get a few words out without feeling like you will pass out by talking.  You should be able to say hi, hello, and comment on the weather through heavy breathing.  If however you have enough wind to talk politics, you have slowed down to much and need to pick up the pace.

For a little more info about the talk test, check out this article from the CDC:  Talk Test Article

There you have it.  With your voice as your guide, you are on your way to maximizing your time at the gym and achieving the results you want and deserve!

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

Action, Action, ACTION

Taking action is the key to success!


There I said it!  Lesson over; I have taught you all you need to know!

In case you do want to know more, read on:

First, a few updates.

We had an awesome Ustream chat this morning.  If you missed it, watch the replay here: 

https://www.facebook.com/1Year1000Challenge/app_196506863720166

http://www.ustream.tv/broadcaster/new/8482161

As I mentioned on today's chat I am doing a lot of  "re-organizing" to do my best to deliver on my 10x value pledge I made to you all.  Part of that "re-organizing" is going to be presenting exclusive offers that will be available only to members of my newsletter.  Do not miss out, get all the info here: Newsletter Sign Up 

On that note, I will be holding my first seminar on the first weekend in March.  Space will be extremely limited so keep your eyes and ears open for when the opportunity to sign up becomes available.

The topic will be on Relationships.  How to attract and create the relationship of you dreams, and how to reconnect and reignite the passion in your current relationship.

Lastly, Spring is just a few months away.  To help you get in shape not just for spring, but for the rest of you life, I am putting together a contest for you all.  I will buy the winner of this contest a pair of designer jeans, of their choosing, valued at up to $300!!!  Yes, I am that dedicated to helping you achieve your fitness goals :)

As you all know, I have been testing and refining a new exercise/nutrition method that is getting my personal training clients AMAZING results!  I have been working hard at making the program full proof.  I am proud to say, I got it down and am ready to share it with you.  I am going to unveil this program as part of the Designer Jeans contest.  Keep your eyes open.  Members of my newsletter will have the first opportunity to sign up for this awesome contest.  One more time, here is the link to sign up for my newsletter:  Newsletter

Ok, so the secret to success, success in anything in your life from financial to relationships is taking action.

You can read all the books, You can watch all the videos, You can listen to all the motivational speeches, You can study every "guru's" teachings, but none of it will help you create the life you want to live, unless you put the knowledge you learn into action!

Taking action is absolutely essential to achieving whatever it is you want in life. 

Action, Action, Action!!  

Ask yourself, what is one thing you can do right now, what is one action you can take that will put you a step closer towards achieving one of your goals?

Now whatever it is, get to work on doing it.  You and Your life are worth it.

Carpe Diem,

Jesse

A Nutritious and Delicious Smoothie

I had no idea what I ate could be so exciting and cause such a buzz!

Many of you wrote to me and asked, "What the heck is in that smoothie I see you drink?"

Before I get to the smoothie, I am really excited to share a couple of updates with You:

• I am going to start offering online seminars.  This will be your chance to work with me in a small group.  We will cover, in depth, a range of topics from: Facing fears, Over coming adversity, How to make more money, How to create the relationship you have always wanted, and many many more.  Keep your eyes out for notifications of when these will begin.

• My FIRST BOOK, "Ouch My Heart Is Broken, A Heart Break Survival Guide," should be available on Amazon.com and Kindle by the end of this month.  I will let you all know!  Thank you so much for the support and encouragement.

• I have an awesome new fitness program that I have developed!  This program will literally melt the fat off of you in 28 days and leave you with a flatter, more defined, stomach.  I am working at putting the finishing touches on it, stay tuned for more info and when you can sign up!

• I mentioned it a couple of weeks ago, but I am going to start offering special promotions, discounts, and services, exclusively for those of you who subscribe to my newsletter.  Don't miss out, subscribing is free, and I promise it will be worth a read.  Click here to subscribe.

Ok, back to the SMOOTHIE!!  MMMM, my mouth is watering just thinking about it! :)


I started to answer a couple of the emails, but then thought, why not just video me making it so you can see the whole process and then you can make it yourself.

So I did! :)

Watch the video below to see how I make my delicious and nutritious smoothie.

To recap, here is the ingredient list.  Remember you can modify the serving sizes based on your specific  nutritional needs.

• An Orange
• Blueberries
• Strawberries
• Scoop of natural/organic peanut butter
• Scoop of protein powder
• 1 tablespoon of flaxseed
• A cup of water

Blend, then mix in the following

• 1 1/2 tablespoon of chia seeds
• A scoop of fiber

If you are using chia seeds let it set for about 30 - 45 minutes so that the chia seeds can absorb all the moisture.  If you are not using chia seeds, drink up and enjoy.  :)

Enjoy the pics,

Carpe Diem,

Jesse